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This all began when people told me I as burning out and I should take a break..So I went to a good home only for a month. The next thing I know is that my wife is in a memory unit. I didn't like this but I let go. Every time I visited her she begged to go. Well the home wantedto keep her, 10,000 a month, All I saw was that she lonely and Isolated.
I won't do it alone this time .I will get good aids to help us out.I will be home and she will be home. The respite did me no good, and the memory unit did her no good.She will see her psych.,on a regular schedule and see what happens.

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Good for you, eating what you want, when you want, having privacy, your own surroundings are intangible benefits of living home. Please get a lot of help. Start slow and when your wife likes someone, and you trust them, hire them full time. I am so proud of your courage and love of your wife. I believe you are doing the right thing. my dad died peacefully June 6, 2015, in his bed, a man, calling the shots to the end. While it was very hard, I feel fulfilled, like I can do anything. I loved him, and it was my priceless gift to him. Dad started sundowning, crazy dementia, but was fine in the morning and afternoon. Hospice gave us lorazipam it was a godsend. Remember to take care of yourself. Good luck for what it's worth, I think you're a helluva man.
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Such a tough decision. If the manager of the facility says your wife seems content most of the time then I am inclined to keep things as they are. As for you moving to care for her in an assisted living situation, that would depend on how YOU feel about leaving your home. Keep in mind if you do that your wife will be in a strange place once again and she might still want to go "home".
You are a loving and good husband and whatever you choose to do should be best for you as well as your wife.
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Yea Ritchie. Find someplace where you could live in the same facility. Great idea I think.
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The director is probably right. It is like leaving a child, the first day of kindergarten. If I hung around and waited and walked him to the door every day, it was the same thing. Crying and wailing. But, when I left him to go in with his friends, he was fine.

Good luck. Does the facility not have Independent Living, where you could live, too?
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I drove to the home with an upset stomach. Am I doing the right thing or not? I gotta
tell everyone that I was scared. When I got there my wife was doing her usual, take me home routine? The mgr. took me into his office and said she only does that for a few minutes when you come and go. He showed me quite a number of photos of her having fun. He said you know you still have 3 weeks that you have paid for, so why not let her stay?."The Best Laid schemes of Mice and Men! So she is still there.
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Good luck Richie. I'm cheering for your success!
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