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About a year ago, Mom went to Ann's Bra Shop to be fitted for bras. After about a month or two, she said they didn't fit right. Then she went back to Ann's with my sister and was fitted again. Months later, same complaint...they don't fit right. So, we decided to go to JC Penney's and try there. She tried on at least 30 bras (I'm NOT exaggerating)! Finally found one that fit and seemed happy with it. You guessed it, not long after, she told me that it didn't fit right. So, off to Kohl's we went. She tried on 32 bras (count em...32!). She finally found one that she liked...whew! Here we go again....the bra is irritating her skin. I can't find anything besides fabric in the spot that she's pointing to. I'm not seeing an irritation, what I am seeing is marks from her scratching, which magically seem to disappear after a little while. No seams on her bra in the spot she's pointing to...nothing that feels like it might be poking her. HELP! I just don't know what to do to make her happy and find a bra that she's happy with. Maybe she just needs something to gripe about and wants the attention. ANY suggestions that you can give me to make her happy are greatly appreciated. I'm at a loss of where to go and how to deal with this.

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Here's my update....I took Mom to the doctor and he said told her that he, too, does not see anything on her back. He told her that sometimes we just have an itch and she should find a tree and scratch like a bear! It's nice that he has a sense of humor. She seems to be past complaining about the bras, thank goodness! Let's see how long this lasts. I love all of your suggestions and truly appreciate each and every one of you!
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It definitley sounds like two issues may be going on at the same time. Definitley get her to the doctor to see if she is developing a skin condition and two, I believe you are correct when you say she's doing it for the extra attention. Wannek has a fabulous idea. If she isn't aware of EVERYTHING, just fib a bit and tell her it's new. Our secret. wink, wink
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wannek...that is BRILLIANT!
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I had the same problem with my mom and bras. It's too much to take her shopping so i brought her a variety of sizes and styles from different stores. After trying them on she decided on two which she now complains about. Not sure if your mom has dementia Like mine, but one day it's good and the next not. So all i do now is tell her the one on the drawer is new and to try it and she likes it for a day and then i continue the game that the"other"bra in the drawer is better which she agrees for the moment. So basically I'm working with the same two bras
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Roxanne-

Sometimes when my mom would say how much she liked an item of clothing she was wearing, just to make conversation, "I bought that for you". You would have thought I had just given her a birthday present! Her face would light up, and she would say, "Really?! That is so nice of you! How sweet! Thank you!". It turned into an easy way to cheer her up or even get her out of a "You're not the boss of me! You're ruining my life!" kind of mood.

All that to say, maybe your mom's bras can be seen as brand new again. You could put them away for a while (how long depends on how bad her memory is). Then, reintroduce the one she rejected the longest ago, saying something like, "I just saw this in the store and I thought you might like it". If this works, she could wear it for a while until it is no longer perfect, and then you could put it away and reintroduce one of the other ones. They could be recycled this way indefinitely and each time you could get a break from the itchiness thing. And she would get to enjoy them as a nice new item of clothing and as a nice thing you did for her.

Good luck and keep us posted!
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sandwich42, I use to have issues buying shoes because I have such a narrow foot and all the good shoe companies I use to buy from no longer offer narrow....

But lo and behold I found SAS shoes (look them up on Google).... I call the shoes with laces my "nun shoes" but they are so darn comfortable to wear.... and for summer the open toe shoes. They aren't cheap, well made last for years, they come in all sizes from slim to wide.
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I am trapped in the same boat with my mom and the search for the perfect shoe. I took her to the local nice shoe place with a pedorthist to have her fitted. There was one pair that fit her wide toes, narrow heel, and extra tall instep. Nice black leather merrills and she hated them. Bought them, but won't wear them because they are "ugly". (Whatever...).

I have to wear the same shoes everytime I visit because she goes rabid if she thinks I have new shoes.

Last time I visited, she had giant blisters on a bunion from insisting on wearing some old, run down, too narrow shoes she won't let anybody take away. I suggested she stick to slippers until that all heals up, but I'm an idiot who knows nothing about the world.

I refuse to waste my limited free time going from shop to shop having her try on pair after pair after pair for no reason. Mom had about 250 pairs of shoes in her house, as part of her OCD hoarding. She is limited to about 3 in the semi-private room now, and it's really bothering her not to have shoes covering the whole floor. (And she wondered why she fell so much at home.)

This isn't about shoes in reality. But...

I am looking online at different velcro slipper shoe choices, that might pass as more shoe than slipper, fit around her instep, bunion, and let that be the end of it. Going to stores is not an option. I can leave these and remove the old bad shoes "to have them fixed". Wink wink.
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We're going to the doctor for a check up tomorrow. I'm going to ask him to check out her back and the "moving itch". She complained about an area about and inch and a half above her bra last week. When I told her that her bra doesn't touch that area, the itch suddenly moved!

@Kedwards - I feel your pain! I agree, the "perfect" bra just isn't out there. Or I should say, it's out there for a week or a month, then it's just a horrible bra!
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Omg! I thought I was alone. Same thing with my mom. We went to Penney's, Victoria,s secret, numerous catalogs, etc. They fit and work for awhile until they don't. Fittings up the you know what. Mom has a hump in her back so they ride up her after awhile plus she had a lumpectomy. She keeps looking for "perfect bar". It will never happen.
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Since the complaints are also with new bras that haven't been washed, it can't be the detergent. Her mind is playing tricks on her,but if it's an itch try Benadryl gel, used for bug bites. It will ANY itch away.
Instead of bra or camisole try a stretchy yoga tank or exercise bra, which support but don't bind.
Realize that she's obsessing about this- fixated on it. If there's no problem you can find she may have skin sensitivity from irritated nerve endings. Perhaps medicine from Dr can quiet those nerves.
You've done all you can, so it may not be best to reinforce the fixation by another try on session. How about changing the activity completely. Try to divert her attention, not that it will be easy, but getting her to focus on something outside of herself may help. Good luck!
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@Sodonewithsal1 - No, she doesn't sleep in her bra. She just needs something to complain about! I guess I do, too...since I'm complaining about her! :)
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Does she wear a bra to sleep in? There are some ladies who got into that habit because they thought it would prevent sagging. (It doesn't.) If she's sleeping in her bra, it might do her good to leave it off at night.
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Silverts and many other web stores have soft cotton camis with a built in bra. This might be the next step out of traditional bras for mom so she can stop worrying that one spot, or at least make it easier to put some topical anti-itch cream on it. Google "senior clothing".
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THE EMPOROER IN NEW CLOTHES - READ THIS STORY
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Buy 3 items for the samething. Have her pick out onw. return the others. Let her wear them for a week. If she yells, then write don the losy ones ad tyy 3 more ln a month or two. she get it

go on lline " google jc penniek hane, pennies, fuite of lume. jpw tp ,,measure check and bust sizek pants shoes, and hat. Tak her ta 2nd hand stoe store. OR Hire some one e;se to help her. These specialty bra stroes shouel hav dome one out to hlep you.
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Mussimo from Target, t shirt with bilt in bra is nice. Target has lots of things, Hanes, Fruit of Loom, etx. Shoes: Acorn Spa Wraps are great... Sketcherts had light weight shoes that are slp on. Nice of big feet liek mine... Good luck.

Skethcer and Acorn shoes. fuzzy slippers wit non grip bottoms. Who cares aht shw werars at theim time/ Sory ambian bpard/ gpt tpgp tp sp[[;e mpw/// oops.
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Any lace on the bras? Sometimes while trying them on at the store one doesn't feel the lace until the bra is worn for a day.
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Maybe she's got the beginning of a skin irritation from sweat and friction from the bra rubbing. Try washing the area more frequently and putting an antifungal powder under her breasts or wherever she says it's rubbing/itching.
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Have her evaluated for obsessive-compulsive disorder.
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She's on to something new! The bra seems to be okay all of a sudden. Now she NEEDS, HAS TO HAVE new shoes. I guess we're going to go through any item she can think of!

She's become somewhat obsessive. First it was her nails...she filed them constantly. Then she obsessed over her hair loss. Next, she was on to she needed new rubber gloves for the kitchen. The bras came next, now it's new shoes.

I have to keep reminding myself to be patient. :)
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Just occurred to me - maybe she has an allergy to some material in the bra, the elastic possibly?
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H&M has these tank tops with built in support, and I'm sure a lot of places offer these things.
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sports bra. tank shirt then a top over that? Nothing too binding. How about a bathing suit bikini top? sting halter top, or halter bra? around the waist and around the neck.

Try Big 5 or a sporting goods store, golf shop, tennis shop...yoga shop, then take to yogurt treat. Or try an ace bandage around her girls, or a tube top.
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The itching due to liver issues doesn't mean you are also turning yellow.
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twocents, oh my gosh, my Mom is the same way about clothing. She can't understand why she can't buy a certain item today that she had bought 10 years ago.

There are undies that we both like and it was a couple years ago that we actually found them at a store. Recently I found the identical product on a website.... YES, everything is right with the world.... at this moment :)
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I agree , always rule out anything medical. However, if it were liver related I would expect to see skin color change, yellowish perhaps.
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I don't think the itching has anything to do with the bras, detergent, or anything going with the outside of her skin. This may be a sign of liver disease or other health problems going on inside. Get her to the doctor for internal issues, not a dermatologist. I had a problem itching in one spot on my back and didn't even realize I was about to scratch through some blouses. Guess what, problem was on the inside not the outside.
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Sometimes one never really knows. Try eliminating all possible causes as suggested by other posters. Then, just refuse to take her and wear no bra. Use powder which helps with moisture.
My own mom has stated she likes something and then will turn around and kvetch about it.
Some of the problems are things we have no control. Underwear is made by different companies each time I buy them so there is quite a variety. However mom had the notion that it should be exactly the same each time she buys a pair. Ain't gonna happen. So I refused to get into the rut of rummaging through countless underwear and the endless cycle of buy/return buy/return.

two cents ¢¢

two cents ¢¢
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First make sure it isn't something medical, have her checked by a dermatologist, has she had a mammogram, otherwise tell her she is a free woman and burn the bra and how much money she will save not buying them. Also , she gets a lot of your time trying on 30 bras!
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We do wash her bras by hand...she had the same complaint when we were using the washing machine. We're using Woolite, which is a pretty mild/hand wash detergent. We also use this for her support stockings and she has no complaints there.

@ freqflyer - no zippers on her shirts or tags that are in the area she's complaining about. We've been applying hydrocortisone to the area as well. I've "inspected" the area, and there is no redness, dryness, or rash. The mystery of the phantom itch continues!
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