Very sick of my sibling not helping.
I am new to the site. I was looking on the internet for a local caregiver group and I ran across this one. I have read so many stories similar to mine. My story is that I am the eighth of 8 children. Unfortunately, one sibling passed on last year suddenly who was a paranoid schizophrenia which was the oldest of us. My mother had 3 strokes last year. I was there to stop the first two from taking a toll on her, but the last one I did not even know she had one. Thanks God it didn't paralyze her or impair her speech, but affected some of her cognitive abilities. Well, my 16 year old daughter and I moved in with mother because she was weak and had continence issues for awhile. No one else wanted to step up to the plate so I said I would for awhile. Well, it has been very trying for me and has definitely put a strain on my relationships with my other siblings. They don't understand I still have to work, take care of my daughter, myself and our mom. My sisters feel that they can come over anytime they feel like because it's mama's house. I have asked them nicely to stop that because I work they do not!!! and I need my rest and so does everyone else in the house. Those request are ignored continually. They are always saying call me if you need me and when I do they always sick themselves of say I call you back and never do. I cook, clean, wash clothes, mow the lawn, grocery shop, take mom to therapy and doctor appointments, make sure has meds replaced, wash and comb her hair, take and pick up my daughter from school, take her to get her nails done, take her out of town with me, and other errand that I may have. the list is insurmountable. Since my mom has recuperated well the state will only give 2 hours a week for caregiving and that's when I am work not when I am off. I wanted to move my mother in another home due to her small house restrictions in the shower and just the lack of space to move around in. I was gun ho about the idea this summer, but I am thinking that they will not work. I have no help from any sibling for anything instead they have enough nerve to ask her for money at times and want to come over and eat every Sunday without bringing . anything. I realize this was my decision but it has burned me out already. Thanks God my mother can do her daily hygiene, walk without assistance, and even cook for herself from time to time. I am in the middle of trying to make decision should I move with her or move by myself ? I am asking god to guide me because he knows my heart and the guilt that I feel. But I need a break and I am just so exhausted!!! There is no sense in talking to my siblings or anyone else in the family because they just don't understand the daily grind of caregiving for her. I am restless, tired, feeling sickly daily and my mind is constantly raging of trying to make the best decisions for everyone involved. My siblings children are fully grown and married. I want to spend adequate time with my child and I cannot do that all the time as I wish. Her father co-parents very well with me and I can' thank him enough. I'm just sick and tired of every dam thing. no one cares of about how I feel. They say I have an attitude.