I am trapped in my own life and feeling guilty for it.
I'm a newbie here and needing some reassurance. My mother-in-law has been living with us for the last 9 years. And I am exhausted. I work full time, am diabetic. I hate coming home to be told what to do and how to do it, and to have her continually bring up my shortcomings to my hsbd. I do her laundry, take her to her appts, take her on weekly grocery shopping outing for her snacks, cook her main meal of the day. She does nothing to help around the house, but has plenty of ideas on what needs to be done. She is physically capable of setting the table, running a dust rag, etc. And I feel like I have no time for myself; then I feel guilty for feeling this way. She is the only parent we have left between the two of us. But my hsbd and I have very little "our time" and the stress is beginning to show. This has been quite the financial burden as well. She pays $300 a month to help with expenses, but at this rate I will need to continue working until one of us dies and I will be really peeved if she outlasts me. It feels like a merry-go-round that I can't get off.
I am a quiet person and she just won't quit talking. I find myself fantsizing about running away or what it would be like without her. But then I feel like a bad person for having those thoughts.
She has isolated herself from friends and family, doesn't call to connect with them, refuses any invitations to go out with us or others.
What is appealing is having her in some sort of assisted facility. We worry about her safety as she has a tendency to fall. We have provided her with a Rescue Alert, but she says she would be too embarrassed to use it.
Wow - this has really been a pity party. Sorry to go on so - I guess i really needed to get it off my chest. Any suggesions or ideas on how you've dealt with similar situations would be greatly appreciated. Until then, I guess I'll just keep keeping on.