Their future vs. our future.
My in laws have all their siblings and their families in another state and they are begging my husband [their son] and I to move back so they can be "happy" towards the end of their lives. Never mind that it was her idea to move to Alaska and when we discussed making that move that they both would be buried in Alaska. "Yeah, I know" was her response. Never mind that the people we leased our apartment to in Utah didn't pay the rent for 3 months after the lease was over [it renewed month to month after the 12 month lease] and now we owe over $10,000. There is no one in Utah who will give us an apartment. We pay our bills, I promise. We're not ones to neglect something we owe but we didn't live in that apartment for 6 months when the lease was up. I don't want to live with anymore of my in laws because I've been through that already and I'd go homeless before putting myself through that again. My husband has found a wonderful job here in Alaska where we can plan for our future here. But his parents insist we move back, live with whoever, and find another job that's just as well paying and good as his job now. I take care of them full time and I get paid by the state for it but Utah doesn't have that kind of program so I'd have to find a FT job myself and no one will be able to be with them. I get so annoyed when she brings up moving back. She doesn't know how hard it'll be. She won't be the one to pack up everything. She now refuses to do physical therapy because she wants to move back and she's tired. If she's not at dialysis or eating, she's in bed sleeping. I feel justified in not wanting to move back because it's foolish...but sometimes a part of me feels like we should just so she can quit complaining about everything. I've been taking care of them since we got married. I don't like being pitied but I do want to plan my future with my husband after they're gone. Moving back for them changes everything for our future. All of their family in Utah say they'll help us out but when we go back for visits none of their siblings, except 2, come by unless it's the day we're leaving. Ugh. Am I selfish in thinking about our future?