The cursing is wearing me down.

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Since MIL moved in with me......................she swears up a storm. I know, I know, it's the disease.
Dare I call it - an elder verbally abusing a caretaker?
Or is that awful for me to say?
Please understand that this is not a UTI or pain response. I've been down that road and know the difference. I try to stay away from drugs as I get the impression from this site (and others) that it is "wrong to drug a person with dementia." Eventually I had to give her Seroquel in the morning and trazadone at night. It doesn't make her any nicer. I use Haldol on occasion and it helps a little.

I think I'm just venting because I HATE the swearing and feels like she does it just to "get my goat."
My late husband and I did not swear (kids either) but now tons of cuss words are directed at me in her loud booming voice with no rhyme or reason.
Takes a toll on my self esteem
Anyone else sensitive about this?


Yes, I am. In my case it isn't cuss words, but angry words. To be honest most of the time I think my mother hates me because I am not as old and disabled as she is. Maybe I remind her of how she once was and it makes her angry.

I think medications are fine if it makes life more pleasant for both the care receiver and giver. We don't want to zonk them out to zombieland, but if something helps with agitation or depression, I think it is a good thing.
Caregiving can be lonely. Oftentimes media focuses on the poor elderly person.
But seriously, some of those poor elderly people are like pit bulls. And the caregiver is hesitant to speak up and appear unsympathetic. Fortunately I have a full time job and am able to work from my basement...........I see clients etc there. So there's lots of people in my day -and it helps.
The lonely part is..............not feeling free to verbalize my feelings about MIL - for fear of being misunderstood.

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