They say the talk at the water cooler is all about aging parents these days.

Follow
Share

Good Morning - Just found this support group; needed someone to listen to who is also having these family/parent issues. They say the talk at the water cooler is all about aging parents these days. My father is living alone, still drives, by doesn't hear well and cannot communicate. He tried to burn the house the other day, so I have someone coming in to cook once a day for his lunch. He's fighting me; says they are keeping track of him. This aging thing is not for sissies!!

This discussion has been closed for comment. Start a New Discussion.
Find Care & Housing
18

Comments

Show:
This is definitely a legal matter - speak with an attorney
(0)
Report

Yes, the house is my and my husbands name only
(0)
Report

I have cared for my mother since my dad died in 1999. She has Parkinsons, and in 2004 it became obvious that she was running out of money and could no longer care for herself. I called my sister who said, "sorry, I have my own life." Since both my mom and I each own a small house, I decided we should sell both and build a home where we could all exist. Everything went along fine (as fine as it can be when an 80 years old wants to discuss her problems 24/7)
When we decided to do this, I told my sister what we were doing, and that no money would ever be sent to her since my husband and I were willing to take her in.
We have paid all bills, while my mother purchases only her make up and personal items.
Now, my sister (a 43year alcoholic) has convinced my mother to live with her, and they want all the money back.
My husband and I have literally given up our lives for the past 6 years caring for Mom, (even cleaning her carpet at 2:00 am due to a bowel accident) and we still want to live in this house. My mother has the dementia that goes along with Parkingsons.
Any advise, please
(0)
Report

Pa does his own shopping and gets some of the prepared foods, but he forgets how to use the oven and puts microwave packaging on the stovetop. I'd rather he did not cook. He loves brownies and pies; puts them in the oven and for whatever reason they are still there a couple days later, uncooked.

Don't know why he does not have any trouble driving, but does cooking. He does so much driving that it must be automatic for him.
(0)
Report

Judy my Mom had meals on wheels and for what she paid daily and got food she got tired of quickly my sister went to a grocery store and got prepared foods for her to have which worked out well so that might help you also some stores have good sales on frozen foods meals that are easy to prepare.
(0)
Report

1913, it's even more difficult when they are in your home as you can't get away.

ldickins, Meals on Wheels is not available in our area, but good idea.

Cat, Thanks -
(0)
Report

Hi Judy,

Would meals on wheels be an option? Perhaps your father would not object as much to having food dropped off as opposed to someone coming inside his house using his things?

I take care of my 81 year old father, who is actually doing better than he was 6 months ago. He lost most of his vision so he can't drive, but wears his hearing aids. Finding the right combination of medications to treat tremors, depression, insomnia, and anxiety is the biggest challenge at this point. And it can be a BIG challenge.

Welcome to the community. It has many caring members.
(1)
Report

Hi Judy - welcome.

I left you a message on your wall - ditto to everything that Austin says.
(0)
Report

Wow! Sounds like you have quite a time. How far do you live from her. Does she live on her own?
(0)
Report

1913, I've found if they decide to do these things (toilet risers, day helpers, etc) for themselves when they are younger, it's easier. As they get older, it's more difficult, probably because they feel they are giving up rather than just changing; plus wanting changes and needing changes are so different. Have you tried to get a power of attorney for health care matters?

edvierajr, I'm so sorry for your loss. When my Pa goes, I'll miss him, but like yours, he is ready to go (or at least he thinks he is) . One of his comments is "if I'm here tomorrow, that's okay, if I'm not, that's okay too" . He was trying to tell me a story today about something, never did discover what, but he tried.
(0)
Report

This discussion has been closed for comment. Start a New Discussion.
Related
Questions