I don't know any more when it comes to the stress of caregiving.
Here goes. I am living in my parents home to take are of them . One having Parkinson's and the other COPD with other bad things going on in her. Dad is 88 and mom 86 . I had moved down to Florida about 5 years ago. We just built a house in New York 5 years prior to our moving and then made the stupid decision to do this. We sold our house and left our $80,000 jobs. What was I thinking. We settled in Florida , got them to being independent but still needing some care . We bought a house near by , so we could watch and be close in case something happened. Well, as they progressed , they were unable to take care of themselves any more. We had to make another decision and therefore let our house go and moved in with parents to take care of them . This has been for 2 years now , full time . Well, everyone knows how the economy is and was a few years ago, we bought our home high and lost our ass on it, but we had no choice to move in with parents . We either stayed in our house and put them in a home or leave and move in with them. I've gone bankrupt now and lost everything. I know it was my decision and not my parents to do all this , but they are making me feel that I have to do this . Oh , I forgot , I have a brother, that has lived by them for a long time . You would think he would have taken care of them , so I could hav ekept my life back home . I wanted to do 6months up north and 6 months in Florida but he wouldn't . He said , he cant do it. To top it all off , he doesn't even work and has money . ( retired early) I love my brother but everyone is telling me to talk to him and help. I have and begged him also , but he has no response. Once I told himn a long time ago , when I first moved here , and we got into this huge fight in front of my paretns and my dad started to cry . I promised this would never happen again . It was haeart braking. I just swallow alot.So I know that it's my problem now anyway to keep taking on the responsibility and not have a life of my own. Well , the main thing why I am letting this out is , I am 55 years old male and have a life partner and he has been with me on this whole thing , but it is tearing us apart. We both know that we will probably never have what we had but we do want to have a life. I can't work , (I've tried ) but as you all know , it's a full time job especially with having twoof them sick. I love my parents and I told them I would never put them in a home . I still tell everyone I can't and won't do it. But I don't want to loose my partner. My partner and I constantly fight . We never go anywhere. As far as the sex part, put it this way, he tells me he feels like he has a roommate. I am jobless , broke, partner fimnaly got a job as a CNA and brings in 200.00 a week . WOOPTY DOO. Try living on that. I went bankrupt a few weeks ago and ruined all my great credit. but kept partners credit looking fantastic . But that doesn't help because he doesn't make enough money to get a loan for a house. I was the one that made all the money to buy a house . Well, I think I am going on a tangent SORRY. I know we have given my paretns a better quality of live , ( even the doctors say) if it wasn't for me they would have been dead. Everyone says I'm such a good son . Yea, Yea Yea . It's getting old. I think you all know what I am saying. I JUST WANT My LIFE BACK and don't know haw to do it. I ran a country club and had 75 employees and made many critical decisions but this is the hardest job I've even had EVER. I've even lost and can't afford health insurance. SO if I get sick . Guess what! I've heard it all from everyone. Well, we're still here and with my demanding parents . I don;t know if I will have to do this on my own soon , but I hope it all works out . Partner and I have been together for thirteen years and raised four kids on our own. I don't want to loose that. We're starting over with everything ,I just can't loose what we have. Well, I guess I will get back to my parents and see if they are alright. This 24/7 @^*# is stressful. What did I do I just don't know anymore. I hope anyone out there that has this problem , is not going through the same thing . IF so , god bless you . All of you out there taking care of someone you love . You all deserve the highest of respect and the best in life . When we get it , is another story.