All of the information on caregiving is overwhelming!


I am 55 and am now doing some caregiving for my husband of 76 yrs. At first, I was digging for information, getting on boards, listening to doctors and nurses and health aides. Just keeping track of who does what, what their titles are, and then remembering doctor appts, and legal appts., along with keeping up with the budget and household duties is alot!!! Not to mention keeping up with the appts. of me. Then I discover all this information on medicaid, medicare, the VA and more! I had looked over this information before, but until you are in this situation, you are now opened up to new information! Boy! I want to say that my little brain is almost to the point of saying, please let me have a vacation or a break, not to mention the elderly that won't know how to go through all this maze of information! Some don't even know, or want to know, how to navigate through the internet.

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I too have had the responsibility of caring for aging grandparents, parents and also get to see my own children and their kids frequently. I'm a serious "Big Mac Sandwich Generation" person. I have tried to impress on those I've cared for that they need to be flexible, as I do and try to see the humorous side of life as much as possible. A change in routine helps as well, short and long trips, seeing old friends and family, etc. seemed to loosen things up. I've lost my grandfather, step- mother, brother-in-law and both father and mother-in-law in the past 3 years. We cared for all one at one time or another. Am glad we could as it has provided some sense of relief that we gave them some pleasures in their final days. I currently work with visually impaired and blind people in Colorado and find this sort of work very rewarding and satisfying. When one loses their eye sight as they age they go thru stages, almost like those who experience death and dying. They deny it's happening, get angry, make pacts with god and hopefully some get to the point of acceptance. We help them thru support groups, adaptive aids, peer menors, etc.

I have been taking care of my mother who is 90 years old for 1 and a half years. She has Dementia. I don't get any help at all with her. However, in the past 3 months, I have finally got the alternatives program to help with 2 days a week of day care and a CNA to come in and give her a bath 2 times a week. I fee like I don't have a life anymore. I go to work and then go home and take care of my mother and everything else involved. housekeeping, bills, cooking. It's amazing how every body all of a suden gets really busy when you need help. I also took care of my husband after a stroke before I had to take my mother into my home.
I took care of him for 3 and a half years before he died. So I know how you all feel.

Where I am not related to the people I care for. I can also relate. I missed an appointment I had, because of a lunch at CoCo's. I showed to get the dogs groomed yesterday and I was a half hour early, but a day late, HELP.