Signs you need more me time?

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Not just time but better quality time. I do get a lot of time to myself, but I spend too much time on the computer. I am tired of dealing with issues or worrying about possible issues with my husband. He had a stroke last August and is much better, but not normal. Plus has something on his heart valve that the surgeon put to repair it. A snow storm canceled the dentist appointment the the hygienist is only there once a week. I was told that I should cancel my doctor appointment to get him into dentist if it wasn't just two weeks after original scheduled appointment. He also has to take large quantity of antibiotics an hour before dental cleaning. Hearing this stuff made me anxious. What if hygienist gets sick and can't get to his teeth cleaning for another month. Don't want to go to stranger. He got the shingles. One week before an important driving lesson. Before I could get him to doctor, I thought maybe cancer. Never seen shingles. That was stressful. Him keep complaining about pain. I just don't want anything else to stress about. It's one thing after another with him. Wish he was healthy but he isn't. I also feel bad for him cause he can't use his left hand. Can't live the life he was leading.


Yikes. It sounds like someone needs a 2-week vacation at the beach free from any worries. Do you like pina coladas?
By now I would think he should have improved quite a bit from the surgery and stroke, and as far as I can remember his mind is sound. He should be able to manage things like arranging appointments himself, has he always handed all the details and worries off to you? Your anxiety and tendency to catastrophize perhaps don't make you in the best person for the job, but it is what it is I guess. Like Jesse said, a little time away sounds in order, whatever you can manage.... lunch with friends, a spa day, a weekend or two weeks with piña coladas :)
He has improved a great deal. He is still in heart failure. But the doctor is trying him on a new drug to see if he can get better function for his heart. Not as many stroke symptoms anymore. It was scary knowing he would have to get on inter county connector and drive in possible heavy traffic. Since he has not done it before in his driving lessons. Then he tells me he didn't sleep much the night before the lesson. That he was nervous. He is never nervous.
Way back when my mom was still living mostly on her own we had an early morning appointment with her stroke specialist in the city about an hour's drive from her house. It was winter, and given that weather can be unpredictable and adding in that I am a nervous driver we opted to hire a wheelchair accessible van to get her there. The fees were ridiculous, but it turned out to be a stormy morning and I'm glad we made that choice.
I'm so sorry Hadnuff. I hear you. After my dad's stroke, I was feeling the same way, it was one thing after another. I kept waiting for things to be more stable or the way it was before the stroke. I didn't realize that this was the new normal. I did have to take charge and be more assertive and take over a lot more of the daily stuff. It wasn't easy and I was feeling frustrated. I wish I had accessed more help including counselling for myself.

I should have done what cwillie suggested. I know its hard to know what to do when you are in the trenches every day. Thinking of you.

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