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My mother is 81 years old and has a diagnosis of Dementia probable Alzheimer's. My mother has 5 children. We went to a lawyer and had set up for the 2 boys to be poa over financial and the 3 girls to be poa over her health. Recently 2 of the children took my mother to the same attorney who helped us set up the poa's and had him take off all but two names, so now out of the 5 children only 2 are in charge. Is it ethical for this same attorney, knowing that she had 5 children(we had all met with him the first time) to go ahead and reissue another poa with only 2 of those children present? Those 2 children knowingly took my mother there to change things to their benefit, they were aware of and had copies of my mothers diagnosis. Is there any legal charges the remaining 3 of us can file?


Only mom can re-do her poa. That must have been the wish she expressed to the lawyer, and he must have found her clear headed about what she wanted.

Do you suspect the siblings of undue influence? Call your local Area Agency on Aging and APS for advice.
Maybe the children who were deleted on the second round really didn't want to be involved.

I think before thinking about legal charges against the attorney that, putting it bluntly, the family needs to get together and discuss what happened and why. It seems as though not everyone is "on the same page."

I'd work on resolving this conflict now before it gets any worse, as it could very well do on down the line.
Bonnie I am not sure how being a POA is a benefit, f done properly it is blinking hard work especially the financial POA. My daughter and I are joint and several POA and I don't do anything without I discuss it with her first, that's not to say I always take her advice - I don't- but I always discuss it first
bonniebett, a person with early onset dementia can still think clearly and make whatever changes he/she wants for Power of Attorney. In fact, a POA doesn't even need to be related to the family.

I would ask Mom why she made those changes. And I would try to get all the siblings to work as a team for Mom's best interest.
Thanks for all the feedback. I do appreciate it. But first, my mother is living in another state with a granddaughter. She was intentionally brought back to another state by the 2 in question and taken to the lawyer. Believe me, my mom made no wishes to redo her poa. It is not possible for us all to have a discussion at this point because the 2 will not give us any concrete answers. We do all want what is best for our mom. But the deceit caused by the 2 is in question. I absolutely feel the 2 just dragged her along and greatly influenced her, she doesn't know from one minute to the next what is going on, my mom I mean.
In my mind, the folks doing the caregiving are the ones who should have poa. Having poas far away, having poas who must all agree? Recipes for diaster.

If granddaughter is caregiver, perhaps she should be poa. Perhaps one adult child should take mom to a lawyer and stay out of the room, so mom can say what she wants.
The way your sibs went about it may be questionable, but the reality is that someONE person has to make decisions. It may seem fair to name all the children as co-equal POAs, but what happens when they don't all agree? What if healthcare needs and financial realities clash? It is much better to name one person, with alternates available to step in if that person is unable to fulfil their obligations. Unless your family is destined for sainthood (and by your question it is obviously not) the way things were previously set up was a minefield, decision making by committee rarely works out.
cwillie, True, one person would have been ideal. But it was set up that way at my mom's insistence, and to have changed it without the consent of everyone involved was such a bad deal. Don't know where to go from here, but we are considering legal action.
What kind of information are you trying to get about your mom? PoA doesn't usually involve a duty to report. In fact, the person's affairs are usually private between the poa and the person who appointed them.

I'm confused. At the first appointment with an attorney, apparently with you involved, the result was that all 5 children were appointed. The second visit, only by 2 of the children and without you, resulted in deletion of 3 but retention of 2.

So if I understand correctly, you agreed originally to 5 proxies but are unhappy that only 2 are proxies now.

Is it the action behind your back, or the secretiveness, or that you don't trust the 2 siblings, or that you specifically wanted the other 3 involved, or what? I think there's obviously some issue more than isn't being addressed.

And be realistic about legal action. Who was the client? You or your mother?
If you aren't the client, what standing do you have to take legal action, and what would it be? I doubt you'd find any attorney to handle a malpractice case, and frankly, I don't see any grounds unless you were the client, in which case the attorney would likely have refused to make any changes.

You can file a complaint with the bar association and it will be investigated, but you could blemish an attorney's reputation because of your feelings toward the attorney. You aren't going to get compensatory damages in any likelihood, and unless you sue you aren't going to get a reversal of the POA changes. So, what is it that you would seek to accomplish?

You made an unusual statement as well that's of concern:

"Believe me, my mom made no wishes to redo her poa."

How is it that you can be so confident of this? Have your spoken to your mother about the changes?

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