I've made a huge mistake as a caregiver for my mother.
Mom has been in assisted living for 3+ months. She has dementia but is still able to dress herself, keep her room tidy and has no mobility issues. She didn't want to move to assisted living so to accomodate for my feelings of guilt and her neediness, I have visited her almost everyday and my husband and I take her out to eat and shopping often. The problem is that she is not really adjusting to assisted living and hasn't formed any real relationships since she's been there. I believe that I have been there too much and since she depends on me so much, she doesn't depend on the assisted living staff at all. She knows that if she refuses to eat, we will take her out to eat. She know if she calls and says she is out of sodas, we will take her sodas. When she says really ugly things to me about what a horrible daughter I am, I over-compensate by trying to do more. Now, I have put myself in the difficult situation of having to back away a little. I really feel that in order for her to fully become a member of her new community, I cannot be around so much. What are your thoughts?