This was a lovely story, however this wife, though she certainly gave up a great deal to care for her husband, she did so willingly and made this decision though she could have afforded to have regular professional help. I applaud her commitment. However, that scenario is totally different than those of us who are forced by financial circumstance to become 24/7 caregivers with little possibility of respite, as well as the awful realities of caring for a loved one with severe dementia. The constant need to "watch", to deal with insults, with accusations, with personal attacks, with day to day, hour to hour, minute to minute changes, the nearly terminal exhaustion does not create any kind of a positive bond. It has destroyed nearly every warm or fuzzy feeling I ever had. Add to this the severe abuse I was subjected to as a child by a stepfather, and when I see the same hateful look in the eyes of the man I grew to love and trust, my fear rises up like a horrible nauseous cloud. I feel no bond. I just want escape. I do not have that option. I spend my days and nights serving his every need, cooking, cleaning up after his incontinence, pitying him, trying to utilize every tool I know to be a more gracious, loving, understanding spouse, but the unrelenting anger and demands drive away my every determination to be one of the people I read about here - that courageous, gracious, forever loving, long-suffering wife I read about. I have moments and he has moments when the man I fell in love with shines -so fleeting -as I think "dear God!", there he is! And then as quickly, that moment is gone. I reach out and touch him, perhaps give him a kiss and a moment later I am back in the dark hole that is created by this horrible illness. One family member comes by for about 3 hours twice a month with her two big dogs, and I prepare lunch. He brightens up, they chat or sometimes go out to lunch or to the hardware store for about an hour and then she is gone, along with her two boisterous dogs, and I am again thrust into the ugliness of his anger. No, there is no bond.