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"Nothing in life will call upon us to be more courageous than facing the fact that it ends. But on the other side of heartbreak is wisdom". ~ Sarah, I Wish I Was Here.



My mother passed away early this morning. Mom was a complicated woman and ours was a complicated relationship. In spite of it all, I always loved my mother and I respected her.



"For better or worse, she is the voice in my head pushing me to do better. ~ Lucy Kelson, Two Weeks Notice.



I want to thank you all for you kind words and guidance over the past 10 months. I don't think I would have made it without you. August 30th, 2016.

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Thanks Stacy. Mom didn't want a funeral - just a family event of scattering her ashes. My parents picked a spot half way up Mt. Hood. My father was an acclaimed mountaineer in his day and we were all skiers - well known on the mountain. So we are to scatter mom in the same spot - but we need to do it before the snow begins to fall, so by the end of the month. The main problem right now is my brothers frustrated with me - the spot is literally half way up the mountain. Four years ago when we scattered my dad I barely made it, but I was determined because I was so close to my dad. Now - physically I'm not in any shape to make the climb so I said I'd go but only as far as the chairlift will take me - and watch from a distance as my brothers and their family's do the sprinkling - not making my brother happy. I go tomorrow to the cremation place and sign all the paperwork... But it's good to be busy - gives me less time to think.
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Rainmom, thinking about you today, and of all the things that you are going through. I have always appreciated how you go about things and your advice, and I hope that you are taking a bit of time each day just to decompress and rest. There is so much to do in these next few days, be sure to pace yourself. Having any sort of memorial service can wait a few days, that is definitely one thing we learned, after the passing of our Dad, and then our Mom, 14 months later. Take care Sweets!
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I am sorry for the loss of your mom.
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My condolences, Rainmom.

I hope you will continue to share your wisdom with us.
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So sorry for your loss, Rainmom. It's complex. After the "get busy" mode fades, be kind to yourself. Mom is at peace. In time, you will find your peace. (P.S. Awesome story from the NH director!)
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My husband and I just got back from starting to get my mothers room cleaned out. My brother came and we made a good start - under pressure to finish by tomorrow so we don't have to pay September charges and deal with the whole prorated reimbursement ordeal. Anyhow - the Director told me a story I thought I'd share: my mom fell quite a bit, but I think it was more of her forgetting she couldn't get around without assistance - so she'd start off and end up kind of sitting down when she couldn't do it. So the director says - I'd go into your mothers room after a fall to do my investigation and every time your mother would snap at me saying "I didn't fall - I was praying"! Sooo my mom! Thanks for all your kind condolences.
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Rainmom..............there are no words. I pray that God wraps you within his comforting arms.
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God speed we are thinking of you and her.
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Sorry for your loss. Know that you did all you could while she was with us and it is time for you to be able to take a deep breath and allow yourself a little personal time.
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My condolences to you Rainmom. Stay strong.....
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I'm sorry about the loss of your mother, Rainmom.
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Rainmom, my heartfelt sympathy to you and your family.
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I am so sorry Rainmom
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Rainmom, you have been an inspiration in the care of your Mother, despite the complications of your relationship, and now you can move forward, knowing that you did all that you could, and sort those feelings in the coming weeks. I'm so sorry for your loss, you are one incredible lady, for her and to us, here on the AC! Please know that I will be thinking of you during this difficult time. Love, Stacey B
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I am so sorry for your loss rainmom.

Angel
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Hugs, Rainmom, and may your mother be at peace. If your feelings are complicated, at least you know you're facing them truthfully. It's platitudes that are easy. Be kind to yourself.
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Rainmom, I am so sorry. Death can be hard to sort through when a relationship is so complicated. But you loved her to the end. Big hugs to you and Rainman.
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Oh, Rainmom. I can only imagine how complicated your feelings are right now. Be well, and be comforted by the knowledge that you stood by your mom.
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Rainmom, how ironic that I'm among the first to post. She was difficult, but she was your mother and your son's grandmother. I hope that she is at peace finally and that you are able to heal yourself and take care of you and your son.
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