Please protect your loved ones money.

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Get a payee account or put the money in a lawfirm's trust account- anything!
Do Something to protect it.
your loved ones money Must be protected and accounted for.
I have learned this lesson the heartbreaking way.
The family member with the checkbook could be the sweetest christian out there
and rob them blind.

17 Comments

It's funny how otherwise decent people can rationalize away dipping their fingers into someone else's pie, be it their parents, their place of business or their family. In the beginning maybe they plan to pay it back, or they're just taking a little advance on their pay or inheritance. Then they begin to depend on it and rationalize that they are entitled to it. Sad for everyone when it all comes out.
I wish Mom had money! Lol
Reluctantly, I am the wife with the checkbook, but having to protect dH and my funds from him! NFD.


(no further details).
Assandache, I wish I had money!
How do I account for all the Amazon gift cards he receives, then demands more from our budget, or pouts, fanagles, lies, plays me, until like a spoiled little boy gets everything he wants (latest a camera, a radio, and that is just what I know about!). When calling for help with this, it was explained that someone on SSDI has their food, housing, and medical but very little else, sadly. So, I don't want to be mommy to my husband, and cannot find a way out. We just had a conversation, and it is not like he doesn't deserve the extra he gets. I hate it when he lies. Who is going to take care of him when I am gone? I swear, he would be homeless, sleeping in the bushes as long as he could order his electronics and bike parts (for 3 bicycles!) online. . But that can be done! He already uses neighbors to have his stuff delivered secretly; and he can use the library for the internet! We went to Walmart (me hating to shop there) and saw so many homeless there, buying their cigarettes and alcohol.
I feel so very sad and concerned.
Hear that sound of purse strings zipping closed?
Mica, There must be a way to protect loved ones money, but I have found a gap when it comes to rep-payee funds if the loved one does not cooperate. Those funds are accounted for, but anything else like cash income, gift income, pension, etc. does not come under that protection, only the SSDI income comes under the jurisdiction of the fiduciary rep-payee. Even though the funds are 'protected', the uncooperative recipient can steal from themselves, as well as unscrupulous family members wanting to extort money! Turns the caregiver into a stark-raving mad lunatic having to be so hypervigilant, all for nothing!
OMG, as my mom's POA I could effortlessly waltz off with half of her money. Family has only a vague idea of what she is worth, I could easily siphon off funds into my own accounts. I really don't know how you could protect assets from abuse, especially when no one but the POA has a handle on what and where it all is. Mica, if your sis had been named executor as well as POA you would probably still be in the dark.
Sorry, that TMI (too much information) just leaked out, as I was freaking out, but I am ashamed now. Was taught to not share finances which only makes one more vulnerable. Sorry.
Mica, That is really sad, criminal, and scary. You have the proof, forgery, and a lawyer. What does your lawyer say about reporting this to the District Attorney or APS too? Can you live with the situation? Won't it eat away at you if you don't allow the criminal prosecution take over? Allow the consequences to lie where they will? Instead of an expensive civil suit, turn her in for identity theft, financial exploitation of an elder? This would make anyone ill, so sorry you have to deal. Wishing I knew someone who would know someone.
Our family had or knew a few bad apples, when the consequences came; and after a time; we were able to befriend and support her after jail. Made us all ill, stressed out, and very informed about the justice system.
P.S. You never know exactly what you are made of and what you can do until it hits this close to home. You have an opportunity to change your sister's life around.

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