A Special Place for My Dad.

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I want to know are there any suggestions on caring for my father at home. He has lived there for over 40 years, and when my mother passed away last year, his mental status deteriorated. I don't believe my siblings, as well as my self want to put him in a nursing home. We are just trying to figure out what to do. Nursing assistants can only offer 2 hours a day. But we know with early alzheimers, he won't be able to live alone. We don't know if we should sell the house and find an adult community or something else..please help


Have you checked assisted living facilities in your area. If he can still do things for himself, he may need to be evaluated to see if he is able to live in that type of facility. Also check with the local hospitals, City Hall, etc to see if there is an Area Council on Aging, or other resources for the elderly in your hometown or state. Hope this helps a little. If yo can find an eldercare agency, they will be your best advisors.
We needed a place to put my father-in-law for the last 6 months of his life. Although we didn't know he only had 6 months left at the time. We found a wonderful foster home run by a young family with 2 little kids and dog. They are from Romania, and in their country it is natural to be the caregivers of their elders. Since my FIL loved kids and animals, it was a perfect fit. There was only one other man living there, and they deliberately kept the patients to only 2 or 3. We chose foster care because it's always small and the chances are better of not getting neglected. His wife would come everyday by lift/or us and spend the day with him.
I am all new to this. I have both parents, 80 and 81. Out of 6 siblings, I am the only one who asks "what did the doctor say" I just found out the doc told my one sister in law that they need to be in assisted living. Dad is an old farmer and they both need "home" for now. trying to get Dad to use the Bipap machine. I had them sign papers to let me get info on that, but think I need to have them do that for the doc's too, because of privacy laws, I can't "know" anything. Like I said this is all new to me, so I am just reading, reading, reading. But meanwhile, Dad is getting frustrated with the pressure on his bipap. I have a call into the doc to maybe lower his prescription..but I have a new appreciation for this whole scenario, and I admire you all, and hope I can only give my best for my mom and dad.
Where you able to find a suitable arrangement for your dad?
Check into Home Instead. For a fee they can do chores for your dad. They are licensed & bonded. Some chores include shopping, bookkeeping, cooking meals, cleaning the house.

Also look into Meals on Wheels. They can provide a nutritious hot meal once a day.

I know how you feel. It has been 3 years since my mom died and dad is slowly losing his memory and judgement skills.

I pray this helps some.
Those National Referral agency popping up around are nothing but worthless coldblooded marketing companies who only care about their commissions. Yes, they will match you up with few facilities in desired area who fit into your budget without any consideration about what your loved one actually need. They never meet with you or your mom or dad, but they will collect money from any home your choose. That's what they are trained to do. And, if you ever checked their website, even once, and provided any personal contact information, they will harass you day and night.
The information they pass around is always available for free on every state site. Yes, just go your state website and search for licensed facilities. You will be able to check them all out, find out all about they citations and rules violations. You should tour many before you make up your mind about what suits better your needs. But, if you put your trust into hands of people who you have never met and who trained to brainwash you and direct you only into facilities they have contract with, you are up to big surprises soon or later.... Do NOT call referral agencies! Be smart!

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