Party people growing older.

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My grandparents lived life big until about 10 years ago when my grandpa had some serious health problems. They are now in an assisted living place where they can still have a toddy and go outside to smoke. I feel like they are teenagers sometimes. They have to go outside to smoke and she is sneaking them into the bathroom. She puts vodka on the shopping list even though they get a shot each nightly after dinner. I take care of them both but my teens act better than they do. I had to tell her again today that if she didn't follow the rules they wouldn't let her smoke anymore. Then she was leaving. I was like where are you gonna go? It's so hard to not to act like her mother and ground her! They were drinking a lot and smoking 3-5 packs a day before moving in last year. It hasn't been an issue but a few times over this year but all at once its the biggest fight with me and the facility. I don't even know how to approach this situation....any suggestions.


my dad and two of his brothers crappied of in their very early 70's, all clean living guys. the oldest brother is still raising hell at the age of 82. hes the guy who keeps a third shift working at anheuser-busch.. factually cigarettes and std's shouldda killed him by now.....but they havent.
If grandma wants to leave maybe she should check into detox. They are both seriously addicted and the only help would come from a professional. I hope neither of them is still driving. Don't forget that the true alcoholic rarely appears drunk and vodka is a good clue. Their facility has a very understanding policy. Be very careful about trying to take away the booze, you don't want to have to deal with the raging DTs. Work with the facility on this one. I don't expect this is the first time they have had to deal with this. What were grandpa's health problems - anything to do with liver disease?
When they moved in their primary gave them supplements to help with the weaning down off alcohol and its more of a " I want to have a bottle so we can have a drink during the football or baseball game." The medical issues with my grandfather had nothing to do with his liver. He had a brain bleed from a bad fall (tripped over his bathrobe tie while I was there that required they drill holes in his skull to drain the blood.) he recovered quite well. We took away driving privileges a few years ago.

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