I am fairly new to this caregiver position and it's a tough one!
My Dad is 76 years old and suffers from COPD and depression. My Mom passed away 33 years ago (I miss her so much!). Dad has suffered from depression every since. He remarried and we married for 24 years until she went crazy and started drinking and fooling around. We had to force her to leave as she was abusing my Dad. Dad became even more depressed after that and his health has steadily declined. He is very demanding and selfish but I still love him and will do anything to keep him out of a nursing home. Most recently, he had to have an aortic abdominal aneurysm repair. He has had a difficult time bouncing back. He fell on Christmas Day and again the day after Christmas. I took him to the ER and they admitted him for A-fib and bronchitis. I fought hard to get him into inpatient rehab to help him get strong before he returns home. He participated in exercises for the first three days and has refused the past three days. They are now discharging him. I am so upset with him because I don't feel he is strong enough. He has lived independently to this point but I'm just not sure if he can live alone any longer. I cannot move in with him and no one else in the family can either. We all have to work and are faced with some tough decisions. Why do some elderly folks refuse to do what could help them the most? It has me so upset and I just don't know what the future holds for Dad. He seems to always be feeling sorry for himself and I can't continue to give up large parts of my life to care for him. I am burning out FAST! My brothers have no patience with him and refuse to help. They may take him to a doctor's appt. of pick up meds every now and then but that is all. I am really struggling and this is all new to me. Any words of wisdom?