Need a sense of humor to get through this ;)

I don't live with my mother, but when I did, I put a window air conditioner in my room and spent all my time in there. I also closed the vents when I could to keep the heat out. I'm also years done with menopause, but I'm naturally much hotter than my mother, plus I'm up and about much more. She sits in her chair all the time, so of course she's cooler.

It's still a problem when I go to her house to do chores for her, because they're all done in the kitchen or her bedroom or bathroom. Forget cooking there. Even changing her sheets has me sweating. I hate to be hot. I hate to sweat. You have my utmost sympathy. Seriously.

cwillie, what helped me at night was to place a small fan on the dresser and let it the breeze blow on the bed. It did make a huge difference for me :)

Ah, the thermostat wars. Any time I visited my parents I had to leave after ten minutes because the place was like a sauna. Yet there was Mom wearing a thermo undershirt, a sweatshirt, a vest, a scarf, long pants, knee socks and shoes. Dad would be wearing summer shorts.... that's it, summer shorts. In winter he would put on a t-shirt and socks.

And oh how the house would have that strange odor because rarely was there any fresh air coming in. I would leave the door open while bringing in groceries and in a flash Mom had that door closed.... [sigh] Sadly Mom is now living in long term care and it is toasty warm in her room.

That reminds me, I need to call the heating & A/C techs to come out to put a regular, non-programmable thermostat on the wall.... the Caregivers are complaining about the heat and it is just Dad living there now, but he can't remember how to reprogram that thermostat and neither can any of us !! Oh, and the house smells so much better as Dad can finally open the screen on the storm door to let in some fresh air :)

I was "thrilled" when I discovered hot flashes can go on for years for some lucky women. My first encounter was in the summer a couple of years ago. Now they're back, oh joy. I thought it might work out because the weather is cooler and usually I am too cold, but now I just shiver and broil alternatively. Pull up the blankets, throw them off, pull them up....

Nope, she won't wear sweaters or cardigans. Actually, this morning she said no more pajama pants anymore, just bare legs because it makes it too hard to get out of bed -- the blankets "stick" to her pants and "trap" her in there.

We have a small oil type heater in her room and an electric blanket on her bed, but still the thermostat is up higher than we are used to and I seem to be feeling the effects most (the kids are thrilled that their penny-pinching mom and dad have been overridden at the thermostat!)

I've been drinking a sage tea and using an essential oil blend for the hot flashes. They were doing great at first, but once the furnace came on and windows got sealed up, I did notice the hot flashes were noticeable again. I like your idea of a spray bottle or putting water on the back of my neck -- I'll try that tonight. They are certainly not as bad as I've heard some ladies have them, but it just seemed like crummy timing, all you can do is laugh and wipe your brow (and fan your shirt, and . . . LOL)

Oh, and your sense of humor is definitely one of your greatest assets! so you're really gold there...

I also have the have the house a bit warmer than usual for my mom. She likes to wear sweaters so that helps, and I bought her some nice fleece jackets and pullovers, which she just loves. Does your dad like some kind of sweatshirt or cardigan that you can give him as a new indulgence?

I wear short sleeves or even shorts inside all year if I need to.... For hot flashes, I used Holy Basil herb capsules to calm my system down, and St. John's Wort which pretty much eliminated them for me. (The St. John's Wort can take a few months to kick in, but then they never came back.) Continual spraying with a spray bottle or sloshing from the faucet with cold water (or ice if you like it) on back of neck and wrists also helps a lot while it's happening.

I passed menopause 10 years ago,,,but I am having the thermostat war with my father....he moved in 4 months ago. We used to tease my grandmother that it could be 93 in the shade outside but she'd wear a sweater & have the furnace on....I thought it was only old ladies that had that problem. You guessed it - we had to start the woodstove in the living room at the end of Sept. It's cold here in Maine, but not THAT cold. So now I come home from work, change into my cotton pajama pants and sleeveless t-shirt and am "sweating with the oldies" all evening! LOL