Mother's Day is everyday if you are a mother! Check your tears in here, and have a nice day!

Started by

What is it about a Commercial Hallmark holiday designed for profit that can bring mothers, daughters, grandmothers, aunts, or even caregivers parenting their mothers, grieving the loss of our mothers to tears On This Day? To become undone; to suffer added fear, obligation, guilt; to let go of budget money for gifts, flowers, cards, trips, visits to Mothers when they haven't crossed your minds all year? Including fights with your spouse over the stress of the whole day, where we should go, whose mother we should see, and what is wrong with your mother?

Well, let's discuss it and get over it. Or at least learn to NOT have our already sensitive and vulnerable emotions tampered with by what boils down to a commercial.
What if you had missed it a few months ago, how would you be feeling today? Feel better yet? Or, you could take charge of your day, do something else, party next weekend?

Well, I am mad as eLL, and NOT going to take it anymore! Deciding that tomorrow is a holiday too: "Forget Mother and live your life today!"
Being a mother, (or a grandmother, aunt), does not define a person's worth
by what others do for you on a Hallmark holiday. Sometimes I wish I was in the flower business on this day!

So, I just wanted everyone sad or tearful to feel a bit better today...DO YOU?


So, why am I still anxious to remind hubs to call his mother, again?
A narcissist, she says it is the daughter-in-law's fault that her sons don't contact her.

Letting this go NOW!
Some mothers are estranged from their children through no fault of their own. We know that if that son walked in the door alive today, he would be loved, welcomed with a hug, given something to eat.

Thinking of those mothers, and how this sadness hits any day of the year, sometimes even wondering if he is still alive.
Feel free to post your own . . . . . . .:)
Going to bed now, this was a sad mother's day on so many levels, I will never get over it.
I am still thinking of all of you.
I am happy for many who have enjoyed a nice day, and sad with those who barely endured the holiday. Nice to see Sharadale back on here again.
Hi Sharadale!
Apparently, Mother's Day already happened in March but not in the U.S.A.,
so the UK friends did not suffer this "special day" as much.
Wondering if Canada has Mother's Day holiday ?

So glad that day is over again for another year.
I'm glad it's over too Send. It was rough and as always,everyone showed their "True colors".
Send: "A narcissist, she [MIL] says it is the daughter-in-law's fault that her sons don't contact her." Boy howdy, my MIL has been playing that tune for the past 35-40 years. And it never gets old -- TO HER.

In conjunction with MIL's family pogroms (or because of), she made it to her ripe old age with no friends. Pathetic!

100% of MIL's human contact is family minutiae, family conflict and family backstabbing. And if there's not enough drama happening to satisfy her, she creates some.

Oh, and the best part? MIL's waif-like insistence that she "can't stand" all the conflict. [Insert eye-roll here.]
Mother's day - every day - for me is all about frustration. My mom is well cared for as in all her basic needs are being met. She is warm. Her clothes and body are clean (mostly). She is fed. Thankfully staff are kind. BUT

Even the tiniest quality of life possibilities still open to her are not being met. I'm thankful she mostly can't hear or see because she is shielded from some of the worst aspects of her life. There is a total lack of privacy. She can not take part in ANY recreational activities because she would need coaxing and one on one help. Her food is stereotype institutional (yes, I've tasted it) and there seems no possibility for flexibility. One saving grace, they have given her access to an iPod with music, but the playlists are very limited... at best a few dozen songs and they seem to think old folks need hymns and calming music, unless of course you are an Elvis fan. Happy Mother's day mom. Happy rest of your life.

Keep the conversation going (or start a new one)

Please enter your Comment

Ask a Question

Reach thousands of elder care experts and family caregivers
Get answers in 10 minutes or less
Receive personalized caregiving advice and support