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and tell she was acting goofy last night because of her ambien and then she would say get off my back just like now I wanted her to scratch my back so I raised up my shirt and she said you should get a pillow to cover my boobs I said my stepdad will not get up at this time of hour and she says are you pmsing and looked at her and said if I was that is not your business and she said you are and I will have to hear the devil come out that made me mad and she said you want to have your stuff taking away I can not reason with her or be nice she arugues with about what I do

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My first thought was - is this person serious? - but then I thought, maybe so. I answered accordingly.
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If this is a serious post, then what you do is either develop some skills in dealing with a person who has clinical depression (or even a person who isn't a morning person) or, maybe this would be better, move out. If Mom needs in-home care, let a professional do it.
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LOL
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I don't think this was a serious post. At least I hope it wasn't. :-S
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Lots of people, even people who are not depressed, are not morning people. They wake up grumpy, achy or tired. After they have had their coffee or other caffeine, their morning meds, maybe a little time to work out the kinks, the mood usually improves a little.

My suggestion is to leave her alone in the mornings to the extent that you can. Buy a backscratcher and don't ask your mother to scratch your back, especially right after you have told her she was acting goofy. Use a little common sense regarding your mother and her husband, and don't do anything she feels is inappropriate behavior in our out of his presence.

How much caregiving do you actually do? If depression is her main ailment, there are medications that usually are able to take care of that. Is she taking her medications?
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I'm 68 years old. I've never raised my shirt so someone can scratch my back...much less exposed my boobs to do so. Are you a teenager?
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