Mother is asleep, and I may want to go to bed too!

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I have been stuck with my parents for many, many years - for
reasons that existed long before they reached elder age - and my
mother has been mobility-impaired since the summer of 2011 and
spends most of her time in bed.

There are other things I could bring up or may have previously
brought up here or on a similar site, but my concern here is
mother's interest in watching certain TV shows, almost all dramas,
and all in "prime time" evening hours when she is most likely to
fall asleep, and, really, has fallen asleep to one degree or
another since long before she reached old age.

It has gotten to the point that I have to record - using an old-
school VCR for now - ALL of the shows that she watches due to her
inability to consistently stay awake through any given evening.
Thankfully it is not a long list, at the most two shows a night
but on at least five nights of the week.

Most nights, unless I'm invited out somewhere, I'm in the next
room on the family computer as I am now, having to put up with
whatever is coming from the telly until the show(s) end or I
become too tired and want to myself go to bed.

I can't just leave her alone, with the TV and light still on, even
if I am extremely tired; there are things I have to do before
going to bed, which may wake her up momentarily but may not always
convince her to switch off the program despite my having multiply
told her it is being recorded; if she doesn't, I am going to - how
be it faintly - hear that TV set perhaps *all night* or until
something else induces her to wake long enough to turn it off, of
course complicating my ability to sleep more than it already is,
and also likely setting me up for further insult from other family
members who get up the next morning only to find the TV and light
still on!

And to exacerbate the matter even more, she will want to watch the
recordings I have made of the shows during which she has been
asleep at the *exact same* times of night as when she sleeps
through them as they originally air!! As you might imagine, this
leads to even *more* sleepiness!

It will ultimately get to the point where I will want to
consistently go to bed at a time before a given night of
watching/sleeping has ended, if only for my own sanity if not for
reasons external to us and this situation, and I am not expecting
some miracle to happen in which she will somehow change a pattern
of behavior that has apparently existed almost as long as my life.
I legitimately fear that my father, whether I still live here or
not, will approach her sleepiness in a more-violent way than I
have been doing unless I come up with a better solution.

4 Comments

Why are you living your life around your Mother's schedule ? Let her home support a live-in assistant and you can spend quality time with your Mom when it's appropriate
Put her bedroom lamp on a timer so it turns off automatically by say 11pm. My tv remote also has a timer on it which I set it to turn off after 2 hours because I fall asleep watching tv too.
@ChrisA1: This is what she wants. She claims that she can not afford anything more than the basic care she has been getting, and that her doctor will only put her back into a nursing facility that will eventually either cost her the rest of her money or risk severe injury to her.

@sharynmarie: The lamp is already plugged into a remote-control device; a timer would have to replace the remote, and we're not sure where we'd even look for one. Our cable company provides the remote to go with our cable converter because the set does not have one; I have repeatedly asked the company to provide the ability to shut off the TV on a timer, but they do not know if or when such a feature will be available.
You can get timers from home depot, orchard supply hardware. The tv remote with a time is usually with the original remote that came with the tv. You can still use the timer on that remote if it has been programmed to the tv even thought you have a remote from the cable company. I use it all the time only to shut the tv off.

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