Mom wants to date, but ...

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I've noticed, with a mom who has some moderate or mid-grade dementia, that she acts more and more like she's in elementary school, the same way of thinking, the same world view. Plus she's more delusional. She's always fancied herself a hot ticket, showing a lot of signs of narcissism, but it gets stranger and stranger.
Last week, as I brought her home from lunch, her neighbor (whose wife had died last year) came up to her and greeted her, giving her a hug. I read it as affectionate, pleasant, and little else.
Well, later on he parked his car close to her apartment. Now, she lives in a small building with 8 units, and there are carports for all 8 units, plus a small lot, which everyone can see from their bedroom windows. He parked near her bedroom window (you can't even see inside because it's raised about four steps), and the spot is near the carport, so it's protected from the elements fairly well.
But, because he parked there, she's decided it's his way of showing romantic interest in her. She's determined that he will be her boyfriend (he's about 12 years younger than her). Why? Because she wants him to drive her around. In fact she wanted him to drive her to the clinic at the hospital for their first date. I told her, I'll drive her (I mean, come on!)
I think it would be great if she dated someone, but obviously because she liked him and vice-versa.
I have no real complaint, but I just think it's odd. Plus, he used to be a truck driver so she thinks he's rich. (She says truck drivers make $50,000 a month! That's the first I've heard of that.) I suspect she's fantasizing that he'll drive her around and spoil her, and this will soon go nowhere, but it's just odd is all!

2 Comments

It sounds like your mom has gone back in time to where she was young, footloose and fancy free and she has developed a crush on this man who symbolizes that time for her.

It also sounds like she may be developing an obsession which is common in people who have dementia.

She does get obsessions, Eveirishlass. At least this is a nicer one. Though if she starts saying he's stalking her or harassing her, it's not good. I'm worried about that. Because in the apartment she's been in, about four or five years, there are eight units, and she gets either really close to a neighbor for about a month (then they do something wrong, and it's over), but she's had several fleeting friendships and says some very strange things about her neighbors.

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