Mom thinks she's fine and wants to come home.
I have written about this before but here is some updates that I need help with. My mom has been in a NH since March 4th 2013, She was diagnosed with dementia. She has been having some really good days and it bothers me to think that maybe she should not be there. I used to see her every day and usually 5 of those days I saw her twice a day albeit short visits. I started to get burned out so I cut out the two a days to once a day. It still wore me out so now I am down to about 3 days a week. The problems are that every time I see her half of the visit is her wanting to come home, when I do not show up she will call me and leave nasty (to me) voice mails. I am POA along with one of my three sisters (mom lived with my wife and I) 10 years ago she signed the house over to me because after Dad died I paid the bills which has been 20 years now. She signed it over to me because she did not want to lose the house just in case she ever went into a NH. She did not want my sisters to know at the time. Now my sisters know and one of them is furious and has been trying very hard to get my mother out of the NH and back with me. She says I own the house legally but not morally. But I did what mom wanted to do and even tho I did not have an actual mortgage I paid for it thru the bill and making sure mom had a place to stay She had a stroke 5 years ago and came home a broken hip 2 years ago and came home but I can not handle dementia. We have a burn mark in our dining room carpet where she dropped a hot iron that she didn't know was on. She has left the stove/oven on the water running and food burning on the stove. My sister has talked to the case worker at the nursing home and said that I should take her home and take care of her. The woman needs professional care 24/7. I do not have the time or money. I am wracked with guilt, hatred and mixed emotions towards members of my family. I did what was best for mom and now need to make sure her safety as well am wifes and my health and safety come first. The furious sister does not like my wife but my wife has done more for my mom in ten years than my sister has done for her in the 20 years since Dad has been gone. Thanks for letting me vent!!! God Bless you all!