Misplaced identity and "skeletons in the closet."
I mentioned this issue a while back on another discussion but thought I'd elaborate and see if anyone has any suggestions for me.
Mom is in assisted living now for about a month. She adjusted moderately well with a few bumps. Mom gets my identity mostly incorrect when I visit her although there a few times where she did get my name and relationship correct. Lately, I've become her husband (my dad, who passed on 7 years ago) although I've been her brother and both of her sons at various times.
The visit usually begins well, we chat, visit the birds, walk to the patio and sit. As time passes and I tell her it's time for me to go to work (I work the night shift) she gets angry and tells me I'm leaving to see other women! The pleasant visit usually ends with her being angry at me and me feeling like hell.. Now for the "skeletons"...my mom and dad had some marital issues back in the late 1960's. I can remember the arguments as a kid. I assume that she is returning to this time. I suppose I now resemble my dad. I wish she would recognize me as her son..maybe this won't happen. I visit everyday in the evening (perhaps sundowning) for 2 hours or so. Maybe I should visit earlier in the day or shorten the visit? Anyone had a similar situation and how did you work through it? I appreciate your responses and thank you in advance!