Mom seems to have targeted me since I am the one who takes her to dr app and such. She has accused me of taking her things, smacked me many times as we were driving up the road, calls me over 100 times a day,tells me I am lying to her, and the list goes on. The dr told me to stop visiting her so often, to go only when she has to go somewhere. She was sitting there when he told me this and she says he didnt say it. She has gotten to the point I am afraid to take her anywhere cause she has no filters on her mouth now and aint above telling someone we dont know that they are to fat. Am afraid she will say something one day and I will end up in a fight with someone over it. We have discussed taking her phone away to put a end to the non stop calling but she lives in a assisted living and they call her to remind her to come eat. Is there anyway to fix a phone so it cant make calls but can receive them? She will call and as soon as she hangs up , will call right back. I have tried to just not answer but the last time I did this, she called 911 and sent the cops over to my house to see about me. I explained to them that she has memory issues but they said they HAVE to ck out each well ck call. I cant even get in the shower without taking my phone with me.We have taken her phone number list away from her so the only people she can call are who she remembers their number and that is mainly me. She was calling other people in the middle of the night. Recently she called me 67 times from 1:15 am till 5.:40 am. The dr says she has jeckle /Hyde demintia and I am her target since my sister still works. For some reason, she can remember when my sister is at work and wont call her but cant remember when I tell her I am going somewhere. She also remembers my cell number and if I dont answer the house she will call my cell. Its so hard to get anything done! Anyone else ever dealt with this and have any ideas?

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I agree with Jeanne it's the dementia.. I would speak with her Dr about anxiety meds... She & you will be much happier and less anxious when she does..

First, try hard to remember that it isn't your mother who is doing this to you -- it is the dementia that is doing it to both of you. That won't stop you from going nuts, but it can help emotionally to blame the right source.

You do need to protect yourself from the dementia. If possible, consider changing your phone number, and screen all calls. Talk to your mother once a day, at some predetermined time. Discuss with the AL whether there might be some other way they can summon her to dinner, so her phone could be removed. Visit her less often, and leave as soon as her behavior becomes hostile. "Mom, you seem to be upset right now. I'll leave you rest, and I'll see you Friday." Do what you have to do to protect your sanity.

It would be good if Mom could be protected somewhat from the dementia, too. Is she on any medications for the agitation? She is not a happy person in the state she is in. If some of that anxiety could be relieved everyone will benefit. Has this been discussed with her doctor? What kind of doctor does she see?

Warm hugs to you, and to your mother. This is a very sad and painful situation.

When I moved I made sure I didn't give my mother (in a NH) the address, just the name of a nearby village as she called the cops on me many years ago when I didn't answer the phone and she wasn't looney tunes back then. Tired of the daily screaming tantrum phone calls I changed my number, made it unpublished and told her it was playing up so I got rid of it and was just using cell when I needed to make a call. She's at the stage she believes fibs and she's never has had the cell number.

I would suggest you go to the police department personally and explain the situation so they have a report on record and try taking the phone off the hook overnight. The cops have your report and they'll get tired of keeping turning up. They may even eventually go to the AL and speak with her which might scare her into behaving. I don't know what else to suggest.

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