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As a fairly young Senior woman... healthy physically so far, other than her "confusion" and "fantasy land" and what I mean by that is if she can't remember she makes up a 'good story', heehee I think I taught her that, she called it lying I called it getting out of trouble!!! Just like she still knows I am lying, I know she is making up a story!!! I also just realized, Mom always said "one day you'll get payback" I never had children so she made sure I got a taste of my own medicine. Mom and I baffle the staff cause we read each others body language and signals from the other end of the hall. This is really the best situation for a person with dementia they are Proper med routine, diet, Safe, Secure,they can do whatever they want within reason, nothing changes day to day, so less confusion less stress means better thinking! Most important is she doesn't want to walk "home" climb out of windows, o out in 20 degrees no coat etc. She was really angry in my care because for her safety I was making her do what 'I wanted" (I needed to, for her safety and health) now even though it's still the same result, safety, I couldn't supply, nothing changing in her surroundings,routine schedule, daily fun activities, stress free environment. Unfortunately until you find out this is best for all, it may be too late to save anyone from all the damage. It is not cruelty to do the best thing! I still am her caregiver just have many elves helping me, I make sure she's treated right has daily needs met and meds are making her better not worse, etc. I didn't abandon her she's not in jail she's getting the best care in a unfortunate situation.

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Awwww, that's wonderful. Congratulations to you AND your mom. I love seeing success stories on her!!!
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Dear wuvs: I am trying to do the same thing. I haven't got a place in mind that takes Medi-Cal and Medicare for when her money runs out. Would hate to move her to another facility if that happened, you know? Best of luck to you and mom. Well done! hugs to you both...tonio999
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Thank you so much for sharing this! Of course you didn't abandon her, and of course you are still her caregiver.

I am so glad you had the courage to do what is best for your mother. Feel proud!
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