My mother is obsessively picking her nose.

This is hilarious. My mom does this too and really seems quite oblivious to it.

My mother does this a lot. So did my father. I wonder if it is all part of getting older and losing inhibitions. Thank goodness she doesn't do it in public.

Join the club. My mom is constantly at the area between her right eyebrow and hairline.She says there's sand in the area. Now going on about 6 months and so far no infection. She had a right shoulder rotor cuff repair years ago and her right arm does not have full range of motion. Does that keep her from getting to the spot? No! She uses her good left arm/hand to support her right arm so she can get at it. Too funny.

I just did a mini manicure on her over Easter visit and cut her nails super short which helps. She has MD orders for Neosporin on area every night. The social worker said that we were lucky as it is super common and some pick areas that are best unseen.

Oh, man... The more I learn, the more I dread getting old. :P

My fil started doing this just this week. Do I just let it happen, or do I say, we need to use a tissue when we do this in public, or do I say lets go to the bathroom so you can clean your nose?

*blushing furiously* I have had this problem ever since I used meth-amphetamine and I am 21 years meth free now. But only at home alone or in bathrooms. There is one spot inside my nose that has never not itched and has a huge scab that fills up my nostril so I can't breathe. I try really hard to just blow my nose but it doesn't make it come out and it doesn't stop the itching. When I am with people I end up just rubbing the outside of my nose with the back of my hand until it turns red, sometimes I'll get a really bad nosebleed this way. I've tried vasoline, ointments, numbing creams. *sigh* I got caught when I was at a stop light once and I wanted to die. Now I find out I am an old lady too. Just great.

I have tried keeping my nails super short, I've cut them so short that they bled. I tried wearing a rubber band and snapping it when I caught myself. I tried growing my nails long and doing them up pretty so I wouldn't want to mess up my manicure. The best luck I had was acrylic nails because my finger nails were too thick, but it totally ruined my nails after a month or two, and then I began picking my cuticles. *sigh* I do believe that this is a form of self injury. I did less of this when I was cutting myself. Buy them some dark blue and bright red bandannas and only ask that they not do it in public or in front of you. And good luck with that.

I am so going to be the pits as an elderly lady, where do I go to sign off? My kids don't need this crap.

@ igloo572: maybe it's early onset of shingles? with early onset, you experience an irritating 'tingle' sensation under the skin, that no scratching can ever relieve...

PamelaSue, congratulations on getting off the meth, hope you are still clean. Please go to see an ear/nose/throat doctor who can prescribe you something that will clear that scab up and try to leave it alone.....do you knit, do crafts or anything else with your hands? If you keep them busy you will have less time to pick at it.
My mother is picking her nose too. Usually in her room but I have caught her at it. She will also pick at "sores" on her face until it is a mess of scabs!! She picks at her head too and only gets her hair done every two weeks (washed and set) because she will not let the careperson wash her hair.
What I found is that if they are compulsive by nature when they were younger, then it is exacerbated when they get old.....this one would never leave anything alone and was always picking at a cut, sore, boil or splinter that I or my sibling might have. It's a sickness and probably part of OCD and her mental issues.
anniecat, shingles are usually around the chest/back/waist area so I don't think it sounds like that.

Pam - try gel nails. They are better than acrylics

Yes seven, 21 years clean on March 15th and still going. No one will ever take this from me. I fought good and hard for it. I lived with a meth addict while getting clean. THAT is power.

Seven, is your mother on any opiates? Opiate use or abuse makes you want to pick your face, your arms, etc. I noticed it when I was on vicodin for my gallbladder, and it got worse when I was switched to morphine.


Joan, that was my last try last spring; I was so excited. I even learned how to do french nails. My nails are like paper now, I passed the polishes and little LED ultra violet light machine on to ErinAnne. I give up. I guess I should have clarified, to me they are nearly synonymous.

Oh gosh, my mother always wanted to pop my zits when I was a teenager, I refused to let her, she freaked me out.

I had a shingles outbreak, which stress can trigger, and even after getting the vaccine I've had reoccurances (more stress!). The doctor gave me a prescription for a cream that even with my insurance was expensive. The pharmacist suggested, Abreva, an over the counter cream that is actually for cold sores. It's expensive too and a little tiny tube, but cheaper than the Rx, and a little goes a long way. Anyway, when I feel the "tingle" I use the cream and the itching goes away.

So, here is what I'm thinking - cold sores and shingles are both caused by a virus in the herpes family. There has also been a study that linked Alzheimers to one of the herpes (I don't remember which). Maybe there is a link, i.e. all in the family. In any event, the cream might help the itching and the need to scratch/pick.

Another thought, when I was a kid, my mother used to get cold sores. When she felt the tingling on her mouth, she would drink a glass of buttermilk. The tingling would go away, and the cold sore never developed. Buttermilk has sometype of bacteria, I think. Strange that a bacteria would take care of a virus, but this was home remedy that worked time and again. If there is a connection, a glass of buttermilk might work, would not do any harm, and some older people actually like it.

My dad did this too. It just started up one day and drove me crazy. I think it's what first brought me to this forum.

Oh, I should have said in my post above that the cream would not be good for inside the nose, but maybe for external picking that others mentioned. Though the buttermilk might helpful for the general itchy/picking urge anywhere. Just a thought!

My mother, who clearly doesn't have Alzheimers because she is so conniving and sharp in so many other areas, has contended for several years that she has WHITE FLIES in her nose. She is sure she's seen them. My dad, who has been married to her for 60 years (she was 17 and he was 21) has tried to rationalize her craziness all of my life (57 years) so he tries to make this sound as if she really did see them. He has become as nuts as she is. My three siblings who live near them all just accommodate her outlandish behavior (I could really write a book) too so being near them is truly visiting Crazy Land. So...I guess we just have to go with the white flies theory!
I read so much stuff on these posts about 'making them get help' or 'getting' them to someone who will help them. I have no idea how much luck anyone has with this but I have given up. I can't fight the whole system (siblings, them, etc). I just can't live anywhere near them.
One more note totally on a different subject - the lady above who suggested 'gel nails rather than acrylic' I think totally missed the point! The woman who was compelled to get something out of her nose sounds to be she made a POINT to get the big, thick acrylics hoping they won't allow her to actually get her finger IN there! Personally, I would see a mental health professional. It sounds like an compulsion to me.

My Mom dose that also she's a retired nurse and kept saying she has an infection but when we went to her primary he told her use to a nose wash I got her a product name Ocean she still do it just not as often.

Frustrated2, I've been in therapy since 2008. They know about the cuticles, I'm way too embarrassed about the nose, just can't bring myself to admit that. It's not like I haven't had umpteen million physicals at the VA and had my nose looked into. I am certain they are aware. I have a long history and I've been with the VA since '81, had the same psych for 21 years. I've quit drugs, heavy drinking, cutting myself, and last month I quit cigarettes! I'm not going to push myself too hard, hell, I think I am darned amazing considering my history, ROFL!

I wonder if it's possible to use a small attachment and vacuum those pesky white flies out? *giggles*

PamelaSue, I think you are quite amazing, especially considering your history, AND the fact that you can laugh at yourself is also amazing. You go girl!!!

im on probation. no booze, no drugs, pissin in alleys and playin with matches is bout all i have left.. * sigh *
home nurse put mom on ativan 7 months ago and took her off zans. nurse told me the other day that a half bottle of zans had mysteriously disappeared here. i told her there was no mystery, i ate the m-f,s. she loves me and hates me at the same time. good balance. lol..

oh yea, nose pickin. if your elder likes to live at 80 degrees like my mother does a humidifier might be good for them.. there aint any humidity in 80 degree recirculated air..

Yes, PS, please see an ENT Doc. Bless your heart, it takes a remarkable soul to overcome addiction. My brother has done the same, and I am so proud of him:)
I am reminded of a song from Music Man we did in high school, " Pick a little, talk a little, (repeat) cheep, cheep, cheep, talk a lot, pick a little more..." It was not about noses, but gossip. Heehee:))) xo

OH THANK YOU Capnhardass for coming back! I missed you so much! Did you have a good trip? smoke a few cubans?

i DO remember that song! those little ol' ladies singing it, tee hee hee!

PamelaSue, mine was the same, constantly nagging about my hair especially, wanting to pick at anything on myself or my sibling, it was disgusting! That's how I knew she had OCD or some other disorder.....she would not let us be. I remember that as a child I used to get these terrible huge boils, and she would force me into a tub full of boiling hot water "you've GOT to draw the poison out!!" and put foul-smelling ointment on it......she constantly had to "doctor" us and had a remedy or pill for every single thing.
The thing that tipped me off that she was a narcissist was that if she had a tiny cut she would bawl like a baby, the world was ending, but if you fell and scraped your knee or in my case, got cut by glass and needed stitches or got bitten by a dog, it was "NOW what did you go and do! It's always something with you!" OMG what an inconvenience!
No she doesn't take any opiods that I know of but with the arsenal of drugs my sibling and I found when we cleaned out her apartment, anything is possible. I know she takes about 4 Tylenols a day whether she needs them or not. She always thinks there is something wrong with her but if you have a medical problem, it's "what's the matter with you NOW?"
By the way - just passed my 7-yr mark without alcohol so good on you!!

This issue is very common. My Dad picks nose, scatches his head until it bleeds. He has Alzheimers. It is worse at home. He does nothing but sit in his recliner and flip TV channels. When his routine is different he is really bad. ** changes socks 5 to 8 times, makes multible trips to bathroom, changes shirts over and over and scratching / picking. And swears he is not doing any of these things. We try to keep his hands busy, but nothing has worked so far. I think his need meds to help, but Doc wants to keep is mind as sharp as possible. Alzheimers is taking my Dad, I think, lets reduce as much stress as possible. So much I don't understand about how our SYSTEM takes care of the elderly. They still have feelings ! !

Seven, taking Tylenol several times a day on a long term basis is very hard on the liver, and when the liver is stressed it can cause itching. Everyone used to think that Acetaminophen was such a harmless drug, it's not. Another thing is that it should never be used with alcohol, something about the two of them not being able to cross the liver at the same time, causing possible death. I never use the stuff anymore. You might try talking to her about that. Good luck of course, lolz.

Hey, Congratulations on 7 years sober! That is a very big deal!!! It's not easy at all, I hope someone took you out for dinner and/or made you a cake. Any day an alcoholic is sober or an addict is clean is a miracle, You are a walking talking miracle! People think this is a disease but it's not, it's a choice. We have a strong predilection for it that we have to fight, so to make a choice to fight it is a huge thing. I'm proud of you. :)


I think one of the most difficult things for the elderly is losing a job. Without the reason to wake up, get that cup of coffee, dress, and head off to work, you feel so lost. For women who never worked outside the home, it's the fact that they have no children to take care of. If they are being cared for, then they are not cooking and cleaning. It's a loss of identity. Might not be right, but we DO identify ourselves by what we do.

When I finally retired for good and then received my VA disability a year later in 2010, I realized I would never work again. Not working was crushing. No reason to shower or dress or wake up or go to sleep on time. Retirement might sound really exciting, but it's hard to accept never working again.

I was so angry at my husband for doing nothing around the house when he was forced into disability by his stroke and cardiomyopathy in 2003. I couldn't understand why he wouldn't take showers, take care of the kids, the house, and cook meals while I worked. I had chosen joyfully to be a fulltime at home mommy to my children. I didn't sit around in front of soap operas eating bon-bons. I volunteered in classrooms, church, community, being a Scout leader for all four kids, and even worked part time during school hours AT their school. His stroke forced me to drop all that. I felt the least he could do was take care of the house if I had to work. And gosh darn it all, you stink take a shower! NOW I get it. I finally apologized to him for treating him like crap for all those years. He lost his whole identity, he wasn't the breadwinner. It just about killed him.

So I am not surprised to hear about the elderly not caring to wash or change clothing or just sitting in front of the TV endlessly flipping channels. I am not surprised by their depression or their picking or suddenly finding the most exciting thing is a doctor's appointment, (unless of course they are a lifelong hypochondriac). Getting old ain't for sissies.

I wish I had the answers, but it's not a one size fits all thing. Which is why the best thing we can all do is share our stories and say, hey this is what worked for my mom/dad, or this is what worked for me. Then we can come in, pick through the salad and find a few things to try out. *smile*

I hope that everyone is having a good Saturday and that the whole weekend will be a peaceful and rejuvenating one.

@seven13: i had shingles; it started with the tingle on my scalp, near the hairline. ran to my eyelid. shingles, usually on the waist / back, but, not always. very easy to be tested for it.

@PamelaSue: Thank you very much! What's even more surprising, not to brag (OK maybe just a little!) is that I did it all by myself, in ONE DAY.....so it can be done. Maybe I shouldn't say all by myself, I had God's help.
It is one day at a time but like all bad habits (for mine was just that: a bad habit that I fell into, and a "reward" for what I did every day as a wife and mother) I found that once I took the focus off it, it was gone. I rarely ever think about it and can go to social functions etc. where others are drinking and I don't even give it a second thought......club soda has become my very best friend!
You have some great things to say and some wonderful observations -- keep being you!!
@anniecat - you poor thing - it must have been torturous. Luckily for me, I have never experienced shingles but know others who have and they suffered miserably. So glad you are over that!

Thank you Seven for all your kind words! :) I quit in one day, but it was almost a decade before the cravings left me, and longer than that before thoughts of it totally left my mind. Now I don't think of it except as "What a freaking waste of my money and life". Imagine coming home from the hospital, being picked up by a husband who was high on meth, while working so hard to be clean. I did that until he got clean about a year and a half later. I know it was God, my Stephen's Minister from church, the women in my Bible study, my Pastor B., my daughter's Preschool at church, the women at church who made meals for my family while I was in the psych ward and Rehab for six weeks. I had a lot of beautiful people who got me through. I am only clean by the grace of God and all those people at church.

Amen to that, PS!! Glad you are having a good, clean life now.......feels good, doesn't it?