I have mastered the art of deception in caregiving.

So, I've posted before about how my mom has an infatuation with 3 medications (Tylenol, antacids, and laxatives) and how, along with her doctor's awareness, I devised a placebo system that makes her think she's getting these items several times a day when she asks for them (calcium, certs, and dark chocolate, respectively). Well...

My mom was a regular drinker for probably 60+ of her 85 years. Mostly beer. The last year she hasn't had anything to drink. She stopped it on her own. Probably because she forgot she even had it in the house as the dementia settled in on her. Today, out of nowhere, she starts going on and on that she absolutely needed a beer. I had long thrown out the beer in the fridge because she wasn't drinking it and I honestly didn't think she should considering the meds she's on (aricept). I tried to remind her she had stopped drinking it but she kept insisting she needed it. Oh boy....

Solution: Nonalcoholic beer! Because I don't drink, I had no clue these even existed! who would have thunk it!

I gave her one with her lunch. She's over there carrying on how good the beer is making her feel. She's laughing and claiming she's buzzing. If you're buzzing sister, it must be the lemon pepper catfish I baked for lunch because that is a good ole cold St Pauli N.A.. I don't drink...but heck, I might have to pour one up for myself!! She's over there getting high off life! I love it!!!!!

Man. I should have had kids. No telling what tricks I could have played on them to make my life easier!!!