Just want to talk to someone.

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Everytime I try to talk to husband he gets angry. Complications with property taxes due in two months on moms house. Brother has deed now. But is on SSI. Trust is not supposed to pay this expense. Husband angry through whole conversation. Don't have any friends to talk to. Feel like crying right now. So much stress and problems.


Hugs, Hadnuff. I hope you're doing okay in yourself. This is still a very hard time, though, so I'm glad to see you on the forum.

Um. Could you call whoever will bill you for the property taxes and ask who is liable for them? If it's your brother, could be he'll have to sell the house if he can't afford to pay its expenses, do you think? But anyway, someone is liable for the tax bill - at least this is a question with a cut-and-dried answer.
My brother is liable for the tax bill as his name is on the deed. He wont sell the house. He is not realistic. The lawyer said apply for tax credit. But bill is due in two months. Not much time. I'm going to pay with trust money. Just realized there isnt near enough money in trust. Was afraid to put much in because mom might need it. Husbands going to get mad again when I tell him we have to use our own money just this once. Hes going to want to get the money back from the estate. Hes angry that the house and most of the money went to my brother.
Hadnuff, whatever you do, do NOT bail your brother out on the property taxes. It is his responsibility since he has the house. Otherwise, when the time rolls around to pay the taxes again, he will look toward you to pay them.

Can you get us up to date... why did your Mom give your brother the house? Is Mom on Medicaid? How is the nursing home being paid? Will Mom need the equity from the house to help pay for the nursing home?

What are your legal responsibilities towards your brother? Do you have any?
If your mom left most of her estate to your brother surely there is cash somewhere to pay the tax.
Do not use your mother's trust to pay for that house. You will need that money to pay for your mother's care. And do not use your own money to pay for that house because it would be a huge show of disrespect toward your husband.

You are not helping your brother by paying his house bill. You are enabling him. Can you help him find a realtor to look at the house and give you an estimate for how much it would sell for?

If you can sell the house, you can use the bulk of the proceeds for your mother's future care and set aside some in a trust for your brother through which he would get an allowance.

Does any of this sound feasible given your situation?
I seem to recall that Barbara's mom died about 2 months ago. Brother has special needs; was house in a special needs trust, Barbara?

This is a question for your mom's attorney. No, you DON"T use your money to pay for the taxes. If brother can't pay the taxes on his own, then he needs to sell the house, take the profit and get himself someplace affordable to live.

Why can't the money in the trust be used to pay the taxes?

Does brother have a case worker?
Mom died April 7 this year. She did a special deed for brother. She had contol of the house while she lived and he got the house automatically when she died. She was afraid of him becoming homeless and also he wanted the house. The trust is for my brother. Has very little money in it. But all the money left in the estate after expenses goes in the trust. My husband is adamant that I don't loose the house. If my brother can't aford it husband wants to buy it from brother. Then we split the money. So brother can pay rent at an apartment. I'm pretty certain brother would never agree to sell to me. I feel a little responsible for brother. Cause mom kept saying you'll take care of him when I die, right. Last few years. She ment financially help if he needs it. I wont spend my own money unless I get it back crom estate.
I would get advice from an attorney on any issue involving real estate and especially losing that real estate. Is your brother disabled? In some counties, disabled land owners may receive a discount or waiver of their entire county property taxes on land. In NC that is possible if you complete the form and it signed by the doctor stating the disability. I would explore to see if that is an option in your state.
The kind of trust mom set up is called suplimental needs. Not allowed to use trust to pay for housing or housing taxes. S S I money is for that. But you hardly get enough money just for housing expences. Not enough to cover taxes. Not realistic.

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