Is there anyone who considers caregiving a blessing?


I just read so many posts of people who seem to hate what they are doing, and even hate the people they are caring for. I consider this challenging work a blessing and an ultimate gift of love, next to giving our lives for another. This is a most selfless act. Tremendously hard, and trying to our selfish beings. Is there anyone else out there that believes this is a blessing? As hard as it can be, I wouldn't have it any other way. And I would hope that if I needed care one day, someone would love me enough to step up and say I will.

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I meant Thank you Rosses, sorry. Never stop talking, you have much to tell.

Much prayer for all caregivers, everyday.Past, Present and future.

Thank you Possess, very much

If any part of caregiving is a blessing it is that the caregiver has the patience, fortitude, strength, just everything that makes the caregiver who they and able to perform a very difficult job. We are an unusual group to be able to provide the care a loved one needs. Most are not able to for one reason or another.

Now everyone give yourselves a pat on the back.

Thank you Smeshque, not only for your comment but for your questions. It’s important to remind us to think about what we are doing, our choices, our purpose and the lessons to be learned, including learning from others’ perspectives.

GardenArtist, I understand your point of view. Call it a blessing or simply personal growth, it’s a transforming experience from which -in a nutshell- we can grow or become bitter.

Every experience becomes what we let it become.

I do without a doubt believe in blessings.

Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who hath blessed us with all spiritual blessings in heavenly places in Christ:
Ephesians 1:3

No. I agree with GardenArtist. For me, this a duty. Yeah, I love Mom and she's been a great mom who did her best. She's a happy person and easy to care for (well, when she's not hallucinating or "manic", which aren't her fault). I've learned a lot, but the chronic exhaustion and stress from my personal life and losing opportunities for MY future, doing everything for Mom, which by itself is crushing, has taken years off my life. Dealing up close and personal with a "death by inches" shows the cruel amount the human body can take and just keep going. This isn't a blessing for either of us.

I don't see caregiving as a blessing or a curse, or in terms like that. I'm not religious and don't believe in such things as blessings, which for me have too much of a spiritual connotation.

Life happens; it's up to us to learn how to turn it into a positive or negative. And we ourselves as well as our responses are strong factors in determining, or allowing, ourselves to be benefited or disadvantaged by the situations.

That doesn't mean that I embrace caregiving, nor do I completely abhor it. It's provided me an opportunity to know my family much, much better, under adverse circumstances which often bring out the best and the worst of people.

I've gained from their strength, and that's helped make me a stronger person (I hope!).

It's allowed for the creation of alternative avenues of care, response, financial management, activities and more. I think this is one of the most important lessons learned - that there are alternate ways of doing things. I see that when I read many of the posts here, by frustrated people whose way of life has been compromised and is now a narrow path with few positive alternatives.

I think these "eye openers" I've experienced have built on a career in law, where the issue of how a transaction can be structured as mundane or very creatively. The Creating Confident Caregiver Alzheimer course I took added to that, opening ways to address situations that were probably unlike any other experienced.

Participation in professional organizations contributed as well, especially a governmental contracting association with a mix of government, military and private sector professionals.

Alternative ways of handling things were also benefited from learning more about backpacking, which initially attracted me because of the peace and calm that comes from interacting with nature. But I learned of methods people use to live for days w/o power and other standards of contemporary living.

These people aren't like silly if not amateurish and ridiculous participants in programs on tv. The backpackers I've met are legitimate nature lovers who span both and untamed wild and a structured work environment. Their strength and creativity has helped guide me to find alternative solutions in caregiving, and that's helped me grow, and hopefully adapt to caregiving more successfully.

I won't deny that I get frustrated, tired if not exhausted, and just wish for a more normal life. But I'll have that eventually, and can benefit from what I've learned throughout the process, and enjoy the rest of my life better than I would have w/o the caregiving experience.

I recall some of what we called "baby lawyers" who were hired by firms for which I worked. They had just completed law school, had their own visions of how life as an attorney would be. Then came the disillusionment when they realized that not all clients are grateful or professional, sometimes they would have to cancel vacations or holiday events b/c a client needed something on Christmas Eve, and that life in a large law firm could be structured in terms of reaching partnership status.

Some became disillusioned, unhappy, sometimes even morose. Others had a more pragmatic view: that particular firm was a stepping stone: get your experience, learn how to network and bring in clients, establish a dedicated client base, then move on. Leveraging their experience was the key.

Whether or not we're caregivers, we would probably encounter changes in life that challenged our plans. I really believe the key to survival is adaptation - learning how to assess the challenges, benefits and drawbacks, and leverage them to make them helpful in the next stage of our lives.

Rossess, thank you. You get it. That is what I feel. You express it so well, and I love when you do.

The way I see things, the answer to the question is simple, caregiving is ALWAYS a blessing.

There are two key aspects to remember, one, is that our human nature is such, that most of us only reach a certain spiritual and mental growth when facing important challenges. Caregiving is a prime example of an important challenge, actually it’s one of the toughest challenges that a person can ever face, as it involves pretty much quitting our own life for others, learning the true meaning of patience, to be disciplined, to be loving even when we don’t have too much to give, to be responsible..and to face and accept death!
Really difficult to imagine a harder challenge.

The second key aspect to remember is that a blessing does not always equal something easy and pleasurable as we would normally think of it. Or said a different way, the true blessing is many times behind or beyond the hardest life challenges. For example, a sunny day, a good day at work, a funny joke...all those are examples of everyday blessings that should be recognized as such...but true transforming blessings are those that change us, those that force us to finally quit fighting and be the clay on our Maker’s hands, as we’re meant to be!

We don’t necessarily grow on a sunny day, or laughing at a joke or feeling content at work.. We grow when we face situations that require us to open our lives to transforming experiences, which always involve giving up ourselves or part of ourselves for others. Caregiving is probably the best example of a transforming experience.

I’d even add that the more difficult the situation we face is, the greater the blessing..This is not some form of sadist thinking! It’s really just realistic logic.
The more I face the more mature I become, the more selfless I get, the stronger I am.. That is the true blessing!

Believe me, every day, and so many times during the day I feel incapable, inadequate, unfairly treated, weak, and even like a failure...obviously none of that is pleasant. But I know for a fact that this journey my mom and I are living is probably the most enriching experience we’ll ever live..and also the hardest!

To be able to recognize caregiving as a blessing is actually the greatest blessing!! And it makes us stronger and gives us hope! Without hope I’d have nothing. I find my hope in my journey and I know without any doubt that God is watching over me and helping me walk through this path that I still have trouble accepting, yet I embrace it, if that makes sense.

I’m not a religious fanatic or anything like that. I’m just someone that was chosen to make a choice, and making that choice has been the most difficult step I’ve taken and keep taking everyday in life, but also the biggest blessing I’ve received.

God bless you all!

I understand that not everyone has the same circumstances. And I do not consider the reason for the caregiving as a blessing. But the act of providing the care for those in need, as the blessing. It is a commitment some do not want, some cannot handle, and some don't even think about.
It's like this, i have a brother who is a lot older than myself, he and I have never gotten along, and he has always belittled me. However, if he ended up needing care and asked me to do it, I would do it. I would not be excited about it, but I would do it. Why? Because as with My Mom and Dad who I loved and love dearly, it is not about me, when someone is in need. It is about the need, and can I fill it.
I know some will have somethings to say in regards to that. But, the truth of the matter is that if anyone needed me to care for them I would do it, with God's help and my strength coming from Jesus Christ.
I am not judging anyones circumstances, for it is not my place to judge. We all wear different shoes.
I am just wanting to know if anyone else understands the blessings behind this. The growth spiritually and emotionally that can be attained. And the reward when we have forsaken ourselves for another. I know the world around says to think about ourselves first. But I do not believe that in any way shape or form.
Love, has a very big definition most people do not even know what it means.
Anyway, I pray for all of you caregivers, it is a challenge. Best wishes to all of you, who do your best.

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