My husband died today of pancreatic cancer.

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His fight began about 3 1/2 years ago. 2 1/2 of that was spent in remission. Now I leave caregiving and begin mourning. What's ahead?
Everyone wants to help but how much can they really do? My family has helped tremendously with phoning almost everyone and helping make all of the necessary arrangements. Neighbors and casual friends offer help but what can they really do?

I'm protected today because family is here to buffer me from the phone for the most part, but real life is still to come and I will have to notify Drs. and any people with whom my husband had made app'ts. and so forth. I've never done this before. I must also try to satisfy my husband's mother and many family members in PA who would like his ashes present for a service up there. So, in effect, a double service.

A new world for me. I hope I cope well but it's a big unknown for me.

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Thanks also to gladimhere, Gershun and Sendme2help. Yes, now you know why I haven't been around posting anything.
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Thank you, Mulata88.
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Colorsue, So sorry for your loss!
I have also missed hearing from you as you were struggling with a sad burden we did not know.
Hugs to you. May your head and heart be lifted up by the Saviour.
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If I could give you any advice at all it would be to try to be in the moment during all this. When my Mom passed I was so busy worrying about arrangements etc. that during her service I wasn't really present if you know what I mean. I'd love to have a do over there.

Condolences to you. God Bless!
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ColorSue I am so sorry for the loss of your husband. Great idea on the list to write down things as you think of them, then when people ask, cross off one more item.
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Yes, accept any and all the help coming your way.
I like to ask: "What Do You Need? ".... instead of IF you need anything.......
Tell well meaning people what you need.
The tough times are ahead, when everyone returns to their respective lives, and you embark on your own, in an unknown journey. Get support, get busy, and take good care of your health.
My heart goes out to you and we'll be here for the next phase. Stay in touch please. Mulata88
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Thank you for all of the words of comfort and caring. I appreciate all of them and any advice, also.
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You take it slow, and take care of yourself. Give yourself time to grieve. Don't rush it, feel it. Go to a beautiful place and look at the view. The ocean does it for me. If you find your unable to start again, see a therapist. So sorry for your loss.
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So sorry for your loss. Prayers and good spirits coming your way. Hugs.
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I am so sorry. Comforting thoughts and cyber hugs are being sent your way.
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