My husband has dementia, prior to going to Assisted Living, he purchased vehicles which he can no longer drive.
These vehicles must be sold, they are not being used and we need the money. The car he drove exclusively, practically lived in it, hoarded many legal documents, car titles, bank statements, etc. is now being sold. I have told him numerous times whenever he asks (over & over again) me to bring him his "papers" from his car that the car is empty, the papers are no longer in it. Today, once again, he asked for something out of his car. I then told him the car is no longer here, it's in a car lot and being sold. He was infuriated!!!! His response was "That's the limit". I talked with the salesman who told me that my husband called him and told him not to sell the car for less than $16,000....(it's worth between 10,000 - 12,000). He told the salesman that "we are having marriage problems" (although he continues to tell me he loves me whenever we talk on phone or in person) and do not tell my wife I called. This salesman knows the situtation....that my husband has dementia. Salesman then said, now I'm afraid to sell it. I gave him the ok to sell it, the car is listed in both of our names with "or" not "and" so either of us has the right to sell it. I also have P.O.A. It's also a fact that the worst thing you can do with a car is to let it sit and not use it, which makes it foolish and financially irresponsible to buy license and insurance on a car that is not being used, and we definitely need the money.
This is the total disrespect I get from him, he is constantly insulting me; I've overlooked it because I realize he is ill; however, this verbal abuse and constant insults are getting more difficult each day. I'm not sure how much longer I can continue. Additionally, his sister, who insists there's nothing wrong with him and seems to think she has the right to make remarks about the amt. of money being spent on AL and seems to be nosing into our finances in one way or another. Whenever my husband talks to the bank, or an attorney, or anything financial or legal, the phone log shows that he always talks with her either before or after his calls. I'm concerned she may try to convince him to change to P.O.A. to her name, so she can control the finances. Additional problems started with him when she picked him up and took him to the bank so he could withdraw money and now, after kicking the smoking habit for four months, he is now smoking, which is incredibly dangerous for his health and finances.
I'm at the breaking point, wondering if a divorce would be the answer, although, I'm afraid each of us would be financially devastated. If there were a chance I could keep the house, perhaps each of us could make it. Anyone else ever have problems similar to these? Please advise. Thank you.