I'm sick from guilt. Please advise. Haldol.....
Mom has been displaying some hallucinations. Prob a UTI again. Doc put her in hospital overnight. Everything else checked out.
We have planned a respite for several months. Took her to very lovely place. The first night I guess she freaked out. They called doc and he ordered a single shot of Haldol. She has been very good since then. But she doesn't even ask about me. When I was there she knew me but no emotion.
Just getting ready to leave and I am sick about it. I don't want to go. Everyone is telling me to let her live there (I've had many health issues from burnout) but I miss her so much. I go and sit in her room.
She may never come home and I feel like I'm to blame. It may not make sense, but I feel I have failed so badly, I wish I could lay down and die. We were so close. Never wanted her in a facility.
Will this wear off? I know Haldol helps some but also read it is a liquid lobotomy for some. My stomach is in knots and I feel like an awful daughter.