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my sister suggested that theres some pay for caregivers out there somewhere i was wondering if there is someone out there that could help wiht this

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As Court-appointed Guardian and Conservator, you use their income to pay for their bills. You get mileage $ if you use your vehicle to transport them, and can get $60.00 a month for yourself. You can charge them rent and utility charges if they live with you. No one pays you
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Dear Lilles,

1) If you are taking care of a parent who is a war veteran, there is a Veterans Aid and Attendance Pension benefit which may be used to pay family members to provide care at home. There needs to be a caregiver contract and thorough documentation about the services to receive this benefit. Check with the Veterans Administration office in your area.

2) Some states have special programs for elderly Medicaid recipients that gives the elderly person a small amount of money each month which can be used for hiring family caregivers. These programs often have a waiting list but it pays to find out. Check with your county Social Services or Office on Aging department.

3) For families with assets where one child is providing most of the care, it is becoming more common to have an attorney draw up a caregiver contract. The caregiver agrees to provide specific levels of care and the other family members or the parent pay the caregiver. You would want to see an attorney who is experienced with Elder Law to have the contract drawn up. The Elder Law attorney can also advise your family about other legal options that may be available in your area.

Hope this helps.
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I am a Retired Nurse Early From Being Diagnosed with cancer. I was just wondering, Why Would you need or want to be paid for taking care of a Loved One?; Parent's, Sister, Brother, Children, Etc. Weren't your parent's and or Guardian there for you when you needed it while growing up? They did not take money from you or charge you! Why Would You Not Do It Through LOVE!?
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Hi Susan,

Most families do provide care for their loved ones without being paid. In fact, based on a recent survey, family caregivers are paying an average of $5000 each year out of their own money to take care of an elderly parent.

But, not all adult children are so financially secure that they can take care of a parent full time. We faced this with my husband's mother. After years of successfully living alone, Nana was no longer able to take care of herself. All of the siblings were the breadwinners for their families living miles away. No one was in a position to retire and move back home or bring her to live with them.

So Nana went to one assisted living facility and then another. But, she never made the transition to her new homes, and became depressed. Her health suffered.

Some employers are not tolerant of employees working only 9 to 5. After more than a year of taking care of my aunt at home, my cousin was required to take early retirement (at age 52) because the company did not see enough commitment to his job. My cousin had hired nurses aides to care for his mother during the day. (My aunt is unable to walk.) But, the company wanted my cousin to work more overtime. He needed to go home on time so the aides could go home. This company has won awards for being one of the top 100 best places to work! Now, his brother, who is still working, helps pay their bills each month.

Given a choice, most adult children would never take money from aging parents. But if it means that the family caregiver can pay some of the bills and continue to care for the elder in the home rather than hiring a stranger, then this is an option worth considering, with help from their financial and legal advisers, of course.
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susan, at first i thought why are you being paid then it struck me, she has money, stocks and a home she owns. Me i don't even own a car yet last year spent 3000 of unemployment staying here in her house taking care of her 24/7. i need to get paid i can not leave this house for more than an hour at atime, no, this family does not help. Why do i still feel guilty, god knows, she mean, disrespectful, and knows erything. Yet what she didn't know was to transfer her money and home into someone elses name 2 years ago so she couldd go into a nursing home,, She still has some grandious idea that the state of maine will not take all her assest for living in a home and she can sell and give her children the money ( the ones that never call or come over.)Which they will trust me i've checked,.. So there is abig part of me that says screw it i need it since i can't have a life, sincee i can't get an income.So yes sometimes i feel guilty but the alternitive is what..
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This is my first time here..I'm so glad this is available for caregivers. My mother-in-law has lived with us for 6 years. We had to fly to another state, sell her home in a week, and bring her out to live with us. She has many physical problems, including dementia. My husband is her only child, so we have no other siblings to help us. I worked full-time before she came to live with us and have since quit my job and am doing a part-time job from home so that someone is here with her most of the time. She has social security, which we take a portion of for room, board and care and to pay for her many prescriptions. We are saving the money from the sale of her home in case she has to eventually go to a nursing home. I see nothing wrong with taking money out for her room and board. The small amount that we take is nothing compared to what it would cost if she was in a nursing home or assisted living. Check your state's Area on Aging site if you have something like that. Our state pays for our seniors to go to Senior Daycare 3 days a week so they can get out and see people their own age and have some interaction. They even have a bus pick her up. She looks forward to it. She isn't much of a talker so when she is home, she just sits in her room and does jigsaw puzzles. When she first came to live with us, she was very negative and would say crazy things like, "Just put me out on the curb". She has always been negative and paranoid about people not liking her. I eventually told her she needed to be thankful that she didn't have to live alone anymore and had her family around her, but she said some nasty things to my husband and we told her if she didn't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all. I have been going through some hormonal problems and the stress has been too much for me at times. I feel trapped, confined, angry, depressed and have experienced physical problems myself. I feel guilty that I feel all that. We never lived in the same state so when we visited her and my father-in-law, we knew we could leave after a couple weeks. When we brought her to live with us, we had such unrealistic expections. I know we have it better than a lot of families. She can still get around and take care of her personal needs. Other than my husband, I feel too guilty to complain about this stuff. Thanks for listening and letting me vent.
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Dear CKWilde,

I sure would like to know the name of the company that has seemingly won awards for being the top 100 best places to work! It seems you have already put in your day's work. Is the overtime mandatory?? Even so, it isn't fair to require someone to retire for this reason.

It should be mandatory for ALL companies in the United States to abide by the FAMILY AND MEDICAL LEAVE ACT where there is some type of provision allowing so much time off for elderly care without jeopardizing your job. All companies have maternity leave, don't they? It seems so discriminatory to me. Birth and death go hand-in-hand.

Under the FAMILY AND MEDICAL LEAVE ACT...."Covered employers must grant an eligible employee up to a total of 12 workweeks of unpaid leave during any 12-month period for one or more of the following reasons:"

for the birth and care of the newborn child of the employee
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This is a continuation of my previous post:

for placement with the employee of a son or daughter for adoption or foster care;
to care for an immediate family member (spouse, child, or parent) with a serious health condition; or
to take medical leave when the employee is unable to work because of a serious health condition.

Baby Boomers, including myself, have inherited this responsibility. In the past, women didn't work as much outside of the home and were able to care for an elder. But with both husband and wife having to work nowadays, it makes for some very difficult decision-making. How can anyone afford to pay for custodial care at almost $20/hour? And, putting our loved ones into a rest home can amount to thousands of dollars a month. If my father would be in a rest home, my mother would lose his entire pension and this is what they live on. There is so much to consider with the aged.

I take care of BOTH of my elderly parents and my 93-year-old father now has home HOSPICE which is wonderful and such a big help. I still work my full day. I use vacation hours every now and then when I need to. When I have used this up, I will apply for the FMLA.

I am grateful my company includes the FMLA in our benefit plan. All companies should do this as well.

Also, I am fortunate to live in Calfornia where we have the Paid Family Leave Act:
Workers who participate in the State Disability Insurance (SDI) Program are entitled to a maximum of six weeks of partial pay each year while taking time off from work to:

Bond with a newborn baby, adopted or foster child
(both parents)

Care for a seriously ill parent, child, spouse or registered domestic partner
Most workers will receive approximately 55% of their pre-taxed weekly wage, up to a maximum of $917 while on leave.

The Paid Family Leave Program is administered by the State of California Employment Development Department (EDD) a state agency, not the employer.

New Jersey has just passed the Paid Family Leave Program in their state. Congratulations to New Jersey!
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Hi dimacd,

An employee classified as "management" is not required to be paid overtime. That classification is used very loosely in many large corporations.

When I worked for a Fortune 500 insurance company, it was expected that I would work 3-5 hours of overtime (without OT pay) each week. I never managed staff. It was made clear to me that this was part of the job.

From what I have seen, women seem to have an easier time using FMLA. It's the men, like my cousin, who face reverse discrimination from bosses who believe that it is not a man's job to provide caregiving for elderly family members.

You are a superwoman to be taking care of both parents and working full-time. My hat's off to you!
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When claming the milage deduction for comuting an elderly parent to and from doctors appts and such, would you used the medical milage deduction or the self employment deduction?
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