I filed for guardianship for mom, 18 year old son is trying to take over.

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I have filed for guardianship of my mom because of her declining health, refusal of care and inability to handle her affairs. My son, who is 18 and heading for a 4 year university this summer, has moved into mom's home and was asked by my mother to take care of her until her 86 year old sister arrives tomorrow??? My ex husband has just filed to stop all child support and payment of educational expenses. I received notification last monday. My ex husband and son picked my mother up from her 2 week stay in assisted living and brought her to her home.I was caring for her in my home for the three months she was on bedrest after surgery. She called a great niece in the middle of the night after a paranoid psychosis, asking to be picked up. I didn't know where mom was for three weeks!They placed her in assisted living. She is wheelchair bound, non weight bearing. My son is refusing to come home and is calling me asking questions re: paperwork, birth certificates, bank statements etc.!!!Mom has paranoia, anxiety, suspiciousness and is refusing medical treatment for a newly diagnosed hyperthyroidism. Her health is continuing to decline.Mom has called my husband asking to have a meeting, a family meeting. This is just absurd and frankly unbelievable. My son is manipulating and hijacking the entire situation. I have consulted an attorney, but I believe I need an emergency guardianship until the hearing. Help! This is insanity, and now an aunt is coming to care for mom and she has health issues and a recent fall and fracture.

6 Comments

Well, for what it is worth, you appear to be doing the right thing on behalf of your mother. Someone needs to be in charge. Let the courts investigate and deterine if that should be you.

What does the lawyer say about an "emergency guardianship"?
The attorney didn't talk about an emergency guardianship, I know the option exists.
Sounds like you need to contact the attorney again, regarding what can be done whle the long process of deciding on guardianship is under way.

Good luck!
Did your Mom give you Durable Power of Attorney? If she did, that's all you need to care for her. Guardianship is designed to be a matter of last resort - after every stone has been turned over and no other choice is left.

Try to resolve this problem with your son rather than fight it out in court as if you go to court to "solve" it, you may come away with no rights to your Mom at all. Judges often bring in third party guardians -- total strangers -- when there's a family dispute. It doesn't matter who is right and who is wrong. Everybody loses, especially your Mom.

Proceed with extreme caution. This is how the majority of guardianship cases begin and then it's shock and horror when expectations aren't met with high probability of court ordered hell. And, it there is the hint of disagreement or oppostition with family members, the court WILL appoint a 3rd party guardian of person and estate.

It's imperative for adults to have Power of Attorney in place while they are able because an event can hit without warning then it's too late with the only option being probate court which is to be avoided if all possible. I know from personal experience and the experiences of others some family members try to rescue their loved one's have legal fees that are astronomical: $100,000.00 and more putting themselves at risk for financial devestation.

I also suggest doing research on the Internet and Proceed with caution! The NASGA website and blog is my #1 suggestion.
Don't go to court, whatever you do - that's where everyone loses.
Visit the NASGA website and you'll see that guardianship has become BIG BUSINESS - for the people who work at it.
Try to mediate family differences.

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