I feel sad for my Mom.
I feel sad today. We had dinner with Mom at the Independent Living facility. She has been there over 8 years and up until six months ago she did nothing but complain - constantly. She was so negative we, and others hated to be around her. (This place is wonderful, the people are wonderful, the activities terrific and the food is great. In short, there was never anything to complain about.) She will be 100, and is quite healthy, motivates on her own, no meds, etc. But she has moderate alzheimers and is becoming very very forgetful and confused. The doctor and facility say she must move and won't renew her lease. We're ok with that because we knew she was slipping and needs help. We have tried for years to convince her to move to assisted living and she has always refused - adamantly. Now she has to move (doesn't know it yet, we won't tell her until there is a room in AL available.) What makes me so sad - NOW she talks about how much she likes it there, seems more content and she has friends and people she eats with every night. (before, she wasted more than half her meal tickets, staying in her apt heating tv dinners and avoiding participating) Now she can't remember how to use the microwave, so she's been eating in the restaurant. It makes me sad - now she is happy, now she likes it, and now we have to move her and she will be devastated and unhappy again. And there is nothing we can do to make it better for her. At her age I worry about what the shock will do to her, even if the doctor puts her on tranquilizers. You can't reason with people with dementia or alzheimers. She spent half her life being unhappy until now, and when she is finally content I'm afraid turning her world upside down is going to cause her to give up. Sometimes life is so unfair!