I know this will sound terrible but I am new to this horrible disease. Don't you feel relief when they are taking a nap and you can relax?

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At least when he is sleeping he is not in danger of falling, etc. He has mild Vascular Dementia but every morning he wakes up I fear he will be worse. I started to work again after a time. It is only 4 hours a day 2-3 times a week. The minute I see he cannot manage the house or take our 3 little dogs out to potty I will quit. So far so good. Thanks for being here for people like me.


Vascular dementia can remain unchanging for a long time, then just when you are used to the new normal there can be a sudden decline. Its only natural to feel relieved when they are napping or down for the night, it's often the only time you can dedicate completely to your own needs and desires without wondering what they are doing or trying to include them in daily activities.
Sounds like you just want to vent a little. I know what you mean, though. My quiet time to myself only happened after I tucked mom in at night. Whew! Another long day.

Though you didn't ask, I'd just like to encourage you to investigate what community services are available for your loved one. I assume he is a senior citizen. Call your local county offices and get the number for their senior services department. They all have them.

Mom got a $700 stipend yearly from my county after she moved in with me. I used it to help pay for daycare at the house for her. It ran about $25 an hour. He's probably not there yet, but, from YOUR standpoint, knowing what resources are available before you need them may provide wonderful peace of moping.

Start investigating senior centers for him to keep him busy when you come HOME from work. Can he play cards? Senior Centers are great for those. You come home from work, take him to the Center and go back home and relax.

Teach him to help you around the house if you (and he) can. Folding laundry, peeling the potatoes, weeding the garden, brushing the dogs. Any and everything you can think of for as long as he's able. Idleness is a curse.

Hope I've said something helpful. Glad you're here.
Peace of MOPING !! Hahahahaha! Even autocorrect can be Freudian!

Peace of MIND!

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