Feel guilty because my Dad lives alone.
My dad is 78 years old and is in end stage of COPD. He also has agoraphobia so he will not leave his house unless by ambulance to the hospital. Growing up he emotionally abused me and to this day I walk on eggshells around him. Out of his 5 kids, I am the only one who takes care of him. I check in on him regularly, visit him in the hospital, calm him down when he panics, arrange for outside care etc etc. I am also his POA. My dad refuses to live in a nursing home, which i dont blame him for that at all. The case manager at the hospital says he is still fine living alone at home but does need care during the day, meals, housecleaning, etc. I am married with an 18 and 13 year old. My husband is a truck driver so he is only home about 10 days a month. My Mom died almost 3 years ago. I feel so guilty that my dad is alone at home at night. I worry that he will need me emotionally. I dont worry about him falling or needing anything to drink or getting to the bathroom...He can do these things on his own. I worry about his mental health. I feel like I need to take care of his lonliness at night. I feel so sorry for him. He will not leave his house. I have 2 kids to take care of but part of me feels like i need to leave them to take care of him. He is fine at night right now. Doctors say he is fine by himself physically still. My dad has always been somewhat enmeshed with me. Expecting too much... My head knows whats right, my heart hurts for him. He has life alert and I live so close to him that I can see the front of his house through my backyard. I could be at his house in 2 minutes. I feel like a terrible daughter even though out of 5 kids I am the only one who pays him any attention. Does anyone else's parent live alone?