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I have to say that when I started this discussion, I didn't know that I had finished it and didn't mean to post it as it shows above. I thought it was a lot longer and detailed; anyway, I was upset because my husband had originally received a phone call from his sister who was passing through our town and wanted to see us and said she was coming to stay one night. I was jumping up and down, pleading with him to tell her that there was nowhere for her and her husband to sleep and I am so freaking stressed out, I didn't want to give up my bed. I was angry at my husband for not saying anything to her about how I felt. I was pissed but I went about getting the place ready. I justified getting a new quilt for our bed and some new towels for the bathroom etc., so at least I got something nice out of the deal. I do have a twin inflatable mattress but it is usually flat by morning! It is the second one that has sprung a leak. At $50-80 a pop, I do not want to keep replacing it. All in all, it wasn't the end of the world, but something inside me always asks..."what were they thinking"...don't they understand that my mother is bed ridden, has to have her diaper changed 3-4 times a day, be spoon fed and have every need met by me? I have hospice coming for her, but that equals a home health aide once a week for a bath and a nurse that comes once a week to check her. Anyway, to have company is a great stress for caregivers...even if you have extra room for them to stay. Our lives are very foreign to people who only take care of themselves each day. All is well that ends well and I will carry on with this journey. I hope everyone has a good day.
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For future reference, they make really nice queen size inflatable beds these days you know. It's not like the old days when your air mattress would be flat by morning.
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Oh my, I didn't turn on my email notifications for this comment I made...thank you all for your comments. Well, I was upset at first, and didn't want to give up my bed, but I did and the visit is over...it only lasted from 4 pm to the next morning at 9 and they were gone. I slept on the couch and my husband on the floor. I guess, being like Mother Teresa never hurt anyone...LOL.
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It is up to the caregiver. The bed is his/hers to decide what to do.
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I see that you are the caregiver for your mother. I take it that family are visiting. Do you give up your bed?

No.

If they are coming to give you respite and you are leaving for a few days while they are there, then perhaps offering them your bedroom makes sense. If you are staying home then they can have the couch or get a nearby motel room.
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What Littletonway said.... If this caregiver is good and you could not do without her, then treat her as such....
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If they are giving caregiver the time off and taking full responsiblity of the caregiving then that sounds ok; however, if they will "just" be visiting and caregiver still has her full duties...then NO. BNL and SNL can stay at hotel.
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I don't understand the comment are you saying do you half to give up ur bed for the BNL and the SNL?
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