Elderly neglect see something, say something, do something.

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Part 1: we arrived at hospital met by an er nurse. Appropriate tests were performed but during that time, because age of 94, no aggressive treatment or anticoagulant therapy could be considered. At first, assessment by the staff was attentive until there was nobody!! !I was waiting for a neurologist. When I asked the er physician as to his arrival, he explained that there was no need for a neurologist to see my mother. He had already consulted dr by phone and they decided to get her a bed on a
"Floor" eventually., it seemed like hours that I was left alone to care for my mother. She was thrashing, unresponsive, uncooperative, removing ekg leads, attempting to pull her iv out, and she was soaking wet. Calling for help did not work. Finally, seeing a young man in the hallway, I asked for an underpad and sheets that I could not find in the room. Fact: the hospital does not provide under pads that protect a patient's skin integrity, as well as provide basic needs, such as comfort from not being left soaking wet on a gurney.. The young man did not stop and offer to help me/ he simply stated. "We don't have chux pads in the er.", and went on his way. Not being able to leave my mother's side and not having my cell phone, I was having a great deal of difficulty managing my mom and began to panic. Finally, I was able to move her cart close enough to the phone on the wall to call my daughter in ny, my husband at work, and my other daughter picking up her son at school. I needed help!!! Holding my mother down, trying to replace the ekg leads, and preventing her from pulling out the iv was wearing on me. It seemed as though that once it was determined that my mother was not a candidate for anticoagulant therapy, she was cast aside as an old woman with a stroke who didn't need emergent care and has already "...;lived a long productive life." , no one has to depend on simply what I claim. I'd like to see if the hospital can produce a continuous ekg reading on frances chishoim. No one entered our er room again until I demanded to have my mother transferred to wesley medical center. Finally, I called out for my mother to be transferred to wesley medical center. It was only then that a nurse entered to explain that they would not transfer her her to wesley. Why? She was stable enough to be left alone unmonitored and her needs ignored by nursing and medical staff.. It was okay for her to lie in her own urine and ignore my pleas for help, as well as calls from my family in Mississippi and in new york. Was there some serious trauma case being attended? Noooo!!!! Prior to getting the er physician back to the room, I got the attention of a nursing student who was unable to help me with the ekg leads, finding new ones or gathering linen to allow my mother to feel clean and dry. However, she did disclose that "The nurse" and "Doctor" were at the desk, and was nice enough to let them know that I wanted my mother transferred to wesley medical center.
As dr jennings refused the transfer without any rationale offerred, I exclaimed." I'm exhausted and cannot provide the care she needs entirely by myself. My mother did not want to come here ever. But you all claim that wesley can't care for her. You stated that they are not certified. What are you doing for my mother? Where is this neurologist?.My mother is soaking wet with no leads on to monitor her vital signs. Unresponsive, with no monitoring, and I'm left to provide care to your patient????" dr repeated that medical center was not certified to care for my mother and that a bed would be assigned to her eventually,.Providing her the appropriate care. Again, my mother's wishes were disregarded. Finally, I exclaimed, "You told me with that pathetic look on your face that my mother seems to have lived a long and productive life and that no neurologist needed to assess her? A neurologist doesn't need to evaluate a cva patient??? I'm taking my mother out of here! We were next door to wesley and I told all repeatedly that my mother never wanted to be taken to this hospital. I went against her wishes because "The experts" at the hosptial lwould be waiting for her. What experts?, I am exhausted and she needs care!!"
I called my husband to get to hospital immediately he arrived and looking very pale suddenly, he reluctantly picked up my poor mother, still attached to wires and tubes tangled. And caught on the cart's side rails, as the staff stood there and watched!!! My husband placed my mother in his "Truck" and we arrived to be greeted by a team of nurses and neurologist, dr. At medical center emergency room. Oh, the only call out as we were carrying my mother out was, "Wesley is not certified to care for your mother."
Frances was admitted to medical center receiving immediate care from er to icu.


Hospitals,NH, ALs are about the money.
When did this all happen, Bichons?
My discussion has been heavily edited by someone on this site.... The real story by title can be found elsewhere onlie
I see she was 94 and died at age 99. Sorry for your loss.
bichons9, so sorry for your loss. That ER experience must have been so scary for you and your Mom.

Both my parents were in the mid-to-late 90's and every time they were at our local regional hospital, the care was outstanding. It didn't matter what day it was or what time of day. But I understand that is not the case for some of the hospitals nationwide that are overworked with not enough bed space available.
You go to a hospital for help.

I too have done the Dance of Apoplectic Frustration in ER in my time. On other occasions I have been grateful and impressed; and I am *always* sympathetic to the pressures on staff and careful to manage my own expectations.

If, on a given occasion, there has been an outbreak of flu or food poisoning or God forbid a major incident, then of course you understand that there is a limit to what can be done, and you know what to tell your loved one, and you cope as best you can.

To have the curtains drawn around you and experience complete indifference from staff who are not under visible pressure and to have your questions and requests stonewalled and to receive no assistance with your LO's immediate and obvious physical needs... That's a disgrace.

As a faint echo of Bichons' experience: I took my mother to A&E (ER) at her local hospital, which alas happened to be among the worst in the country - "chaotic shambles" was one of the kinder comments in its official inspection report: one of the joys of universal health care is that you get what you're given. I digress.

The reason for this visit, which I reported clearly to the Triage nurse, was that mother had been dumped onto her bottom when a bus driver took off from his stop without giving her a chance to find a seat. She was by now in severe pain and having difficulty walking.

We were sent off to wait in the waiting room. And wait. And wait. What was new about this waiting room was that, in order to deter rough sleepers, drunks and mendicants, the hospital had purchased special McDonalds type chairs designed to become uncomfortable after a short period. I went in search of a cushion, a pillow, a blanket, anything to put underneath mother who by now was grey in the face. What angered me about the response I got was not that there "aren't any pillows or blankets" - sorry, this is a hospital, is it? - but the attitude of the person I'd asked for help. Indifference doesn't cover it. I was made to feel that my request was outlandish, that it was absurd to imagine that they would have such things or could reasonably be expected to take an interest in relieving a patient's discomfort.

I repeat: you go to a hospital for help. You don't expect miracles, you don't expect special treatment or favouritism - but you do expect some sign of interest, some kind of acknowledgement of the patient's presence at least, if not her total needs. When you not only don't get it but are treated as though you are being a hysterical nuisance for requesting assistance with even the most basic care, and worse prevented from then seeking it elsewhere, it is maddening.

Health care professionals resent unfair criticism and unreasonable expectations. They would get quite a lot less of those, though, if they understood better that bad communication leads to bad practice and worked harder to remedy it.
Personally, I have NEVER had a good ER experience - not with my son, not with either parent and not on my own. About six years ago my brother took my father to the ER - dad had been there three days earlier, at which time they recommend he be admitted and when my parents refused they reported my mom to APS - yet at the four hour wait mark on the occassion with my brother, they were still in the waiting room. So my brother asked for a pillow and blanket - which he recieved - and he helped my 83 y/o father lay down on the floor - then brother began taking pictures. As our local newspapers front page story had recently been about a man who died in a parking lot of a different hospital because the ER had turned him away, my brothers actions totally freaked the ER staff out - and they called me asking me to leash my brother. Then they revealed to me that they had yet to examine my father - I went ballistic - an 83 y/o with CHF still in the waiting room after four hours?!! And no, the ER wasn't dealing with train wreck survivors. So with me yelling on the phone, my dad laying on the floor and my brother taking pics, they hustled my dad back into a cubical. After my dad spent the night in the hospital he need five weeks in rehab. I honestly believe they go out of their way to make an ER visit as miserable as possible - to keep people from making non-emergency visits. But I swear, I'd have to have one foot in the crematory before I'd ever go on another ER trip.
During my mother's most recent ER visit (weekday evening), we waited a long time for her to be seen. (But she wasn't in crisis, so I couldn't really complain, since the waiting room was packed.)

But what I don't feel was right was that the women's room for the waiting room had flooded sewage on the floor. ?!?! I told the front desk, and they told me I could take my mother back into the ER to use that bathroom. My mother goes to the bathroom a lot, and the next time she had to go, the bathroom still hadn't been cleaned. That is inexcusable.

The medical monopoly for my area always sends out surveys for their medical professionals outside of the hospitals. No surveys for ER experiences, though!

When she was back in the cubicle and on the bed, she had to go to the bathroom yet again. The RN and assistant came in, and got her into a wheelchair, and then my mother said to me, "Arent YOU coming?" I was annoyed enough by that time, so I just said, "Not this time." Let the paid staff take care of her. (I had a broken toe, and by this time (12:30 a.m.), my foot was swelling and I was too exhausted to direct yet another 20-minute ordeal of going to the bathroom. (And I was still annoyed about the waiting room bathroom.)

Which brings me to another point...at what point do we sit back and let the professionals do their work? Should we be responsible for our parents' bathroom visits, feeding, etc. when they are in the hospital? In another thread a man said how he and his mother were both uncomfortable when the doctor's assistant expected him to get his mother undressed and into the examining room gown.
Bishon, YOU can not edit your own posts or anyone elses, the Administrators can and do edit posts to comply with the conditions of this site.... no names, no addresses.

I would like to respond to posts but there is no "reply" button. I am gratified to know that people are speaking out. I believe that if we continue telling our experiences, we may have a chance to change this system. There was one comment above commending on the great care that her L.O. received. Of course, there are many wonderful health care facilities...I worked at Buffalo Childrens and Womens Hospital for 28 years..Patient care was #1. Staffing was more than adequate. In my opinion, the reason for this is the MD's. When MD's c/o inappropriate and inadequate care to their patients..OR ELSE They will take their patients elsewhere..things change IMMEDIATELY.

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