Dad's coming HOME from the hospital!

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I have already written on one of these sites, new to this I think this is the one I should be on. My step dad when in hospital 4/7/7, he is in a nursing home at the moment. Supposedly coming home soon. He had an anyerism, he is paralized from waist down, and half blind. But very smart and strong in the upper torso, he is 77. he will have nurses 45 hours a week and hopefully a caregiver for a few hours they say he does not need 24 hour care and he is high needs UNTILL he gets in the wheel chair. Am I unreasonable to worry about his comeing home


Welcome to AgingCare! We think this is the site you should be on, too! :) It certainly is stressful that your dad is coming home and you're not feeling confident in your ability to care for him. It sounds like you've got some help, with the nurses and caregiver. Keep a close eye on the situation and recruit extra help if necessary. We often give this link to people who need assistance in caregiving. Its the ElderCare locator and they specialize in finding help for people who are in your situation. If you need to, call them at 1-800-677-1116 or visit them online at
So I don't want to be my dads caregiver, I feel horrible I said that. I have been dealing with this hospital, nursing home stuff for almost a year. I am the POA. He is comeing home soon, there are four girls in all, myself and another have stated we do not want to change the diaper thing, and we cannot be there the way he wants us to be. We live about twenty to twentyfive miles away... two others , state they will do what ever it takes to get him home and keep him home. one lives across the street. It is so true what I have been reading about siblings and this problem we have. I mean things have come up that don't even pertain to his health, or welfare. He is my step dad but I love him like my own. I do not know where he got the notion we would or one of us would be there 24 7, I can't. I know emotionally I couldn't and not sure if I would have a husband to come home to. Financially I cannot either. I don't work, of course that is why everyone thinks I need to be the BAckup, they are saying. WE are suppose to have a meeting all us girls to decide, or state I should say, who is willing to do what, who will be there when this supposed caregive one of my sisters is trying to hire, can't make it. I feel trapped, I am the only one who doesn't work, even thou two work they say they will be there I don't know how. I don't know whether to just admit defeat, and just take a chance my husband will still be there later in life, and my grand children will remember me, and just do it to keep the peach and get him home where he belongs. perhaps everything will be ok and the caregiver will come, well be able to pay for it through his insurance and she'll always be there. But what if??? am I wrong?
Failed, Dont ever think you have failed if your dad comes home. That is the best situation for any human being. My dad is in a rehab/nursing home with many issues, the most recent broken hip. He has prostate cancer,blood clots in his leg, he cant stand or walk. I want to get him home with full time care so i can relate. I have the same fears ....cost, reliablity....any info would be helpful..I hope its working out for your family
If he's legally blind then hopefully he won't be able to access power chairs or scooters. I saw what happens when blind people get on them, they end up banging into things and even running into people. I knew someone like that who never should've been given access to a power chair or scooter, in fact his whole apartment was ruined because of this. Blind people simply have no business on anything motorized since they're a danger to themselves and others. The only thing he should ever have access to is a manual chair where it would be much harder to hurt himself or anyone else. Furthermore, the damage will be far less if he does run into anything with a manual wheelchair. Manual wheelchairs can be found at your local Rite Aid store on the bottom shelf, they're in boxes. They're basic wheelchairs with nothing fancy, just the basics. You can also go to your local churches and charities or even see if your local hospital has one they retired and took out of service, visit environmental and see if they have a wheelchair they would be willing to sell you for cheap if your dad needs one
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