I am a full time carer for my mother. The fight I've had with the social care system has been a hard slog to say the least. The elderly and people with dementia seem to be a forgotten race, no one really cares. I know for sure these agencies don't listen. The government are talking about doing researches to find early signs, that's good don't get me wrong, but what about people who already have it. They need a lot of help and support. Some of these dementia sufferers voted these politicians and councillors in and now they can't get the time of day from any of them. As for the care givers we are under valued. Yes they may be our mothers, fathers or family members, but does that mean we the carers don't have a life. We still got bills to pay, we still have desires we want to forfill, we have dreams like everyone else. But because of the red tapes we get next to nothing. You can't really work and as for trying to further your education if you do part time study you can get funding for the tuition only, full time students get tuition and maintenance payment but if you do full time studying you can't receive any carers allowance or income support, which means you can't get your eyes tested or have help with dental care to name but a few. Why should we be penalized because we care. When you get home from college or university you don't stop being a carer. We and the sufferers know what dementia truly is. Why do the government never talk to us to get a better understanding and change all these ridiculous rules they have to make life just that much more better if they really want to help, and stop acting for the cameras or making it look like they are concerned or interested. Seriously something needs to change. We need a change for the better. I want to start that change, are you with me?
ok. having made those statements i admit that both are extremes intended to provoke thought. i agree with you. more public awareness would make life better for senior citizens and carers. gorbachev said it best a few years ago. the way forward will require a sensible mix of capitalism and socialism.
i think dementia has always been apparent in the aged, were just beginning to understand the cause and final result. all of the organs are diseased and compromised in the elderly. the brain is no exception.
i appreciated the help of hospice in our home in my mothers last months but the s**t would hit the fan if they crossed the line between helping and imposing their expectations in our home..
proportion is complicated..
My complaint is that the medical field is researching and inventing drugs to keep you alive for ever, while your brain is turning to mush...Who wants to live forever when you don't even know yourself? Not me!!!
And I have to agree with assandache7 above. If my brain is turning to mush I certainly don't want to be taking half a dozen other medications to keep my body functioning but this is often the case. I've seen it many, many times. Someone completely out of the mind with Alzheimer's, can't speak, doesn't recognize their family, can't feed themselves but let's not forget to give them their blood pressure pill!!! God forbid their blood pressure is too high!
Something that bothers me as a caregiver is when I read things that are supposed to help the caregiver, it is mainly geared to how we can better help our loved one. I get tired just reading it, because I know I don't have enough time or the will to do all the things that are discussed. I do what I can, then feel guilty for what I can't (or don't want to) do. Each of us can only carry a certain number of straws on our back. We can get outside help, but there are so many domestic and income barriers. Getting rid of some of the barriers to assistance would be a good starting place, but I don't know how the states would afford to do it. And there is always the resistance of our elders to bringing help in. This last thing may be the biggest barrier for someone whose family is not helping.