My crazy life as a caregiver.
Where do I begin? I could talk all day about this subject. I'm taking care of my 89 year old mother and it's a life changing event. It drains the very last ounce of sanity from you. It's not the daily "duties" that really bother me, it's all the complaining she does about her illnesses/constipation. All she wants to do is stay in bed. Hearing this complaining every day breaks a persons spirit and depresses the caregiver. I have three sisters that offer no help. I had to quit my job over this....thankfully I was financially able to. I like to travel and go places, but that never happens now. My 24/7 "job" is being a caregiver. Have any of you in the same position ever asked yourself....."why did this have to happen to me"? I have lived with my mother all my life, I'm 54 now and have never married. I guess our family could be called dysfunctional. My father died when I was 15 and it was my "duty" to take that role. Yes, I know that sounds crazy, but that's the "hand I've been dealt". There are many other divorced or widowed women whose children went to college and married then moved away, but not me. It's like I had to be there for my mother. It's almost like I had to give up my life....so that she could have a life. If all families were as abnormal as my situation then no one would get married. They would stay at home with their mother and care for her and not have a life of their own. Doesn't that sound crazy? Yes it is crazy, but that's my life. I know of another lady in my town whose husband passed away. She's 80 now. All of her kid's live out of town and have professional jobs and families. None of them ended their future and stayed at home with their mother. They "lived" their own life. I'm in a very bizarre situation here. People that never went through this would be stunned at the caregiver role. I don't wish this on anyone. It drains you and literally brings you to your knees. A caregiver can get sick very easily with all the stress in their life. Wouldn't it be great to stay young always and never have to deal with the heartache of seeing your parents grow very old and then they die. What a heartbreaking life we all live. There is nothing so great as having healthy parents who live long lives because when you get into a situation like mine.....as you can see, it's terrible. Life is cruel!