Caregiving college students with dysfunction families: a nightmare!!!

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long story, I need advice please. I am in my early 20s and I have lived with my grandmother my entire life. My mom did help raise me financially. I have always been close to her; however, I wanted to go off to college a few years been when I graduated high school. I got into my state's university only 1.5 hours away, and the drama started. A lot of people in my family made comments about me not attending my local community college because I knew it would be closer to grandma and they wanted me to get a job, take my mom's old car, and take care of her where they wouldn't be bothered. I decided to go away to university and 5 years later, I graduated with my bs in a natural science. I was very involved in college and still made time for grandma about 2 to 3 times a month. I called her nearly every day and kept up with a lot of things. Sometimes when I came home from college, I wanted to just rest ,eat, and do my family members would leave me to wash her laundry, clean her house, and do other things on top of my 6 classes of was rough but I have enjoyed being blessed to do it for her. I had this growing resentment that hurts me late at night in my deepest of souls. I have been working nearly 30 hours a week and working on my masters's online. I had a job offer with great benefits and even had an apartment picked out; but I found out where my grandma lived, they had renovations; so I turned it down to stay because I didnt want anyone blaming me or saying I abandoned her. "she left mama on me and I got problems myslelf" so we live with another family member for about another month and she will be moved in, but she has been hospitalized overnight a day ago and is now back. she is slow moving but is slow getting better. I just feel so tired deep down. I am a 24 year old girl who gives up everything and yet, people always feel I should have to stay with her. "well mama/grandma raised her" " how could she" "she owes granny everything" while they who are close in my age get to move away and get good paying jobs and have families and date freely and I am stuck with grandma. Don't get me wrong I love her, but I am tired of selling myself short and doing half of the work by myself and then trying to concentrate on school work and a life. My family likes to go off and do their thing and find out my work schedule and then leave me alone with her when ishould be doing my homework, reading, and just catching up with friends. I am really sick of this shit! should i just apply for jobs and leave????? what to do in this situation. I feel like i am being taken care of by family members? what do you all think? please leave answers and advice.


1)Your family is taking advantage of you. As Dear Abby used to say, no one can take advantage of you without your permission. When you were a child you were easily manipulated, but at 24 you must take charge of your life. Stop giving permission to take advantage of you.

2) You care too much what your dysfunctional family members think. Of course they won't like it if they don't have you to take advantage of -- so?? Let them be mad.

Find a job, preferably out of the area, and leave. That is what grownups do -- lead their own lives.
Yes, you should find a good job and leave! They are using you, and her own children, your mother should be looking after her! It's your time to live Now! It wasn't your fault, that your Mother left you to be raised by your Grandmother. It's her Mom, let her figure it out, and she will! Move far enough away, that it isn't easy to come home on weekends! Good luck, go start your own life!
Why start another thread, when all the information is right here?
I believe people lose their threads when it gets off the front page and don't know about the News Feed link.

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