I'm so confused!


I knew this day would come when I would have to make a decision on moving my elderly parent out of her home. She is n a rehab and before she is released the doctor's are recommending 24 hr supervision. She and I do not have the resources for this type of care but, she can get up to six hours of home health care. I have 3 sisters and none of them are willing to help. I've argued and fought with them and decided to leave them alone. This would be my world and my world only. My mother has always been strong and independent and loved to keep house. Now, she is depressed because she has lost that independency and would like to go back home and try to live once again. She is a fall risk and does not understand the danger. She is trying to convince me that she would be more careful and will not fall again. She is also stubborn and will not let go.I cannot trust her if she goes home. Also, I have not communicated that much since she's been away because it hurts to much and I don't want to encourage her about her future; I do keep in contact with her staff on her progession. She has some memory loss but, she doesn't understand that someone has to be with her at all times. I want her to return home but, I think of what could possibly go wrong. I still work and I am struggling with that because of depression and anxiety in my own home. My family is no help and it is not fair and my mother does not appreciate them allowing me to take on this by myself. Your feedback on this issue would most helpful.

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One more thing...be careful what you do right now...if she is in hospital currently and needs to go to skilled nursing facility for rehab, she generally must go directly from hospital to nursing home for insurance to cover it.

Correction... that would be pour-over will...

One more question...
What is her insurance: HMO or Medicare/Supplemental?

How old is mom?
Is she's being released from the hospital? What what is she there for and how long?
If she's being released from a skilled nursing facility or nursing home, what was she there for and how long?
Does she own her own home?
What are her financial resources?
Does her health power of attorney or advanced directive name YOU as agent?
Is there a general durable POA naming YOU (you may not need this depending on the answer to the next question)?
Is there are trust and a poor over well naming you trustee and executor, respectively?
Has she been diagnosed with any impairment (dementia, Alzheimers)?

Is she eligible for Medicaid? It will be too hard for you to take care of her in her home or your home.

God bless you.

I don't have any answers for you tonight. Honestly, I am too tired to even type. I just wanted you to know, you are not alone. Come check back tomorrow and hopefully my brain will be working better. There are MANY on here to give you advice and support. Hang in there tonight. TTYT God bless and get some sleep.

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