I’m so tired and I just want this job to be finished and have a chance to deal with the grief. I guess what brought these feelings to the surface is, I have to go through all of the files and "stuff" at my parents house to make sure personal information doesn't get in the trash. I found a folder that Dad kept while Mom was dying, I’ve been crying off and on ever since. I try to stay strong and positive. I’m so tired of doing everything, trying to keep it fair and being portrayed as the bad guy. They don’t think that this is stressful for me. I had to watch my Mom and Dad die slowly day after day. Everything in the house reminds me of that.
I get mad at myself, because at times I’m too trusting and get manipulated by the siblings who are just trying to get their way, no matter how unfair it is. But I guess they are right, I would give everything away to people I care about.
I think I need a cheerleader.