I am the maid, the spa, the chef, etc. I just need to vent sometimes.

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I haven't complained in a while, but I do think out loud quite a bit. Let's see: the nurse, hairdresser, toenail and fingernail clipper. If I do go to the grocery store, the only time I get out, I'm rushing back home to mom.


It sounds like your mother needs to get out and get someone else to do these things. But even then we end up being the chauffeur. (sigh) Wouldn't it be nice to have family members that would pick our mothers up and take them out to places like the salon or podiatrist? Then we could enjoy a little down time while our loved ones enjoy a little pampering.
Call your sister and say "would you like to take mom to the salon on Tuesday or Wednesday next week?" "Mom's podiatrist can see her This Friday or next, which is better for you?" Please look into a podiatrist who will come to the house as a Medicare benefit. My grandmother died of gangrene as a result of my Aunt's toenail clipping and poor circulation.
Sub contract the Nurse through VNA; ask the MD for an Rx. Hairdressers are cheaper than psychiatrists; send her to one. A salon pedicure sitting on a massage chair? I actually got the hubby to try it. He's a believer now.
These are small things, but the whole of YOU will be greatly increased by the sum of their parts.
I would go get a job, somewhere else.
I know the feeling. I used to keep her toes done, especially when SIL was in and out of hospitals. To me, it gave a clear sign to staff that she was cared for at home....I still do it, just a little extra for her. We used to go once in awhile to go get our toes done. I'm learning to delegate, I used to do most things for SIL but cook, now I've got the rest of the household on board because her care has been so much more demanding. It helps so much to vent! Coming to this site has helped put my mind at ease with so many issues, and I share with my family advice I get here so we all benefit and don't feel so alone in caregiving. That the frustrations and hardship we feel is valid and normal.

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