I found a way to stop going in circles.
We know enough not to get into those circular conversations with no outlet. But I happened upon something that works at the moment in answer to the "why do you do something or have someone come check on me, etc. I simply asked, "do you think you are old now?" This is the one thing she will not argue with since she loves telling you she is old. It has become my reason for everything. For instance about the caregiver checking on her " That's what is done when someone gets older. All old people who live alone need someone to check on them everyday. I know it may be hard to accept, but you have never been old before so you did not need this before." Hate telling her she's old, but it stops the nagging. I try to use a compassionate voice and face.