I am exhausted.

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I feel so done..............with all the repetition............with the smell,........with the giant bed and supplies taking up my living room.........with the craziness of it all.
I intend to take this to the end but I am running out of steam. We are in Pittsburgh. Wind chills tonight are minus 35. The howling wind contributes to the trapped feeling. Also, I am responsible for MIL and my own mother living on her own 7 miles away. If the power goes out, we're all in trouble. (This has happened before and believe me it gets cold very quickly). I think the howling wind is the loneliest sound on earth. My husband always hated the wind. He has been dead now for 4 1/2 years. I hate that it's his mother in my house and not him. He was absolutely wonderful. She is ...................well - awful.

9 Comments

I'm so sorry for what you're going through. I don't have any great ideas, just a big virtual hug for you. As my mom says to me, "You're getting many stars in your crown for this." You are a wonderful person. That's all I can say, other than hang in there. Spring has to come one of these days!!
A lot of people in the NE are feeling the same way. I read the other day that people in New Hampshire wanted to get an arrest warrant for Punxatawney Phil. I wonder how many of those people might have been caregivers feeling like you do.
a propane weed burner torch can easily heat a house if you get into heating trouble . you can get them at farm stores but theyll set ya back about 60 bucks plus a small tank of propane . wire the torch wand securely to the tank handles and let it blow . major btu's plus good lighting effect .
cant advise ya much on the carer burnout . its just not an easy task . my consolation was , both my mother and my aunt were raised during some hard times and it made my pissy problems seem pale by comparison .
Just adding my hugs to the heap!
Stay warm!!... perhaps it would be better if your mother would stay with you during these storms?

Yes, Spring is surely just around the corner... right after they string up Pux P.
String up Phil??? That's sacrilege! The picket lines would stretch all the way to California.
hehe, somehow I don't think people in California care whether Spring arrives or not since they have perfect weather all the time!
Marialake. ..H€!! To the No...caregiving is not healthy for anyone. At 29 sick husband...raised 2 girls alone...at 56 caring for Mom 10 yrs so far. Bless you for your loyalty. .. because NOT MY MOM NOT MY PROBLEM...i would visit her at a home ....
It happened. My power went out at 3 am this morning..............temp outside was minus 11F and I don't even want to know the wind chill number. I called hospice to pick up MIL as I was worried about the cold (gas furnace but blower needs electricity). Got her all packed up in the dark - freezing dark waiting for ambulance and then power came on. Yippee! I am thankful for electricity as we expect more of the same temps here this week. Sigh.

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